Walking around the town for a bit, one can notice many things.
On the fountain sat a sitarguy, drinking down a little real corona. He broods to himself, muttering "smokesomedoja" under his breath. Confused, I strode on to shop in the local supermarket
. Through the window i noticed a replica of the old roman Coliseum. Intricately detailed, the lions & christians fought vigorously as the crowd cheered on. Even the little claws of the felines had been painstakingly sharpened to perfection. The flowerchild clerk, looking like any generic hippie, screamed some hippienonsense and began writing furiously on her pad of paper.
"What are you doing?" I questioned.
"Oh, I'm just trying to figure out the vedas, but i'm gonna translate them into |337 and call them v3d4's," she answered back. "I know, don't be fooled. Ionlylooklazy, but goddamn it I could be
Governor!"
"Oh, ok. Good luck with that..." I skeptically said back.
I looked around the shop some more, jewish pork over here, resin bran over there......Nothing really worth buying. Spying some koosh balls, i decided to get one. Checked my pockets for money, but alas
i had very little. Thinking to myself, why did it have to be thursday-+-? I would have had my paycheck if it was friday. The hippie stopped writing and noticed my dilemma.
"Well if you can't get a koosh ball, at least get some kosh." The lady offered.
"What's kosh?"
"Something pretty special, but i don't have any. I can show you where to get it though."
Hmmm....what the hell, i don't have anything else to do today. "Sure, where is it?" I prodded.
"First you have to find Crusty McDermot. He works at that interior design place across the street selling kitchkinets...Oh, i mean kitchenettes, hehe. I hate saying that word, too much articulation. Careful though, i heard he had connections with the Don Escobar..." she warned, "Here take this. It's weedwax, give him this for me will ya?"
I didn't really want to, but i agreed anyway and headed over to the decorator's office. Passed by the fountain guy again, only this time there was a toastyroach in his mouth and a Zoltron figurine by his
side. I threw him some of my change and listened to him play F-stop blues for a while. When he finished, the guy picked up the change and stared into me saying, "Lunaria, the cannabismoon goddess thanks you immensely!"
Immediately the musician reached into his pockets and pulled out a pipe. "Haha, it's fotwenny! Now it's time to Light The Chronic UP! Heh, i know you wanna join me. You're only human, yo."
Lookin at his bag as it looked pretty good back at me, I sat down and toked up with the guy. We started talking a little, and i told him I was looking for kosh.
"Ah kosh you say? hmm.... You on your way to Crusty then. Watch out he's got this nigga boy, roy, who's an illfaded excuse for hired help. Don't piss him off though, he's one hell of a sureshot with
his .22!"
What the hell have I got myself into, i thought, this kosh must be something pretty damn good. "Thanks for the advice, man. I'll bring ya back some if i get it, K?"
"Oh thank Jesus and his God, George W. Bush! When you come back i'll have the most beautiful paintballads written for you!"
"What's a paintballad?"
"A song that requires color to write, some Miami toker thought of it one day as he rode an afrohorse through Key West. Takes great skill and I'll have one ready for you."
"Uh, i can't wait...."
"Aite, go and see Crusty, don't forget...........the Jah Jah is real. He fades in and out like the Man in Black." He beamed brightly.
"Ok, I won't. Thanks for the thcbuz." sheepishly saying. Man, this guy's off his rocker...
Finally, i made it to Crusty's. A few bells jangled on the door as i slowly opened it. It was an old store. Nothing more than a few kitchen appliances and a whole lotta cobwebs. The lighting was rather dim for a showroom, and the place seemed deserted.
"Sssss.......who slithers inside this space...." A raspy voice splayed from the shadows. This was all followed by a cocking sound of a gun.
Quickly rummaging through my pockets, i quivered. "Uh, the woman from across the street asked me to give some of this weedwax to Crusty..."
The room remained still, but a few rustling noises crawled along the walls towards the back. Moments later, a small child slinked into the light. He had nothing in his hands, so either he had put his firearm away or there was someone else. "Crusty is through the door." he harped, pointing at the white doorway.
I walked into the back room, only to find the fattest man alive with all sorts of mucus around his face sitting at a desk in the middle of the floor. Horrified, I let out a moment of revulsion but prompty
regained my composure. The man didn't seem to care.
"Roy tells me you have some weedwax, that must mean you are looking for something too. What do you seek?" he said solemnly.
"Kosh, do you have kosh?" I retorted.
"Unfortunately, i don't have any at the moment. The Rev and Dr. Feel Good might. Here, take these addresses and they should help you out. Better leave soon, boy. I got a whore called Jennatalia coming in at 5," he leaned over and yelled to the door, "Hey Roy! You wanna hooker too?"
"Nah, girlshateme." The door screamed back.
"Eh, suit yourself." Crusty glared at me again. "Take care wanderin over to the Rev's place, a lotta missbhaven happens on that route."
"Thanks." I repled flatly, already almost out the white door. Back into the showroom again there was no sign of the child, so i shrugged and walked out.
Alrightly, next stop: Dr. Feel Good's pharmacy. Sterile stainless steel, the smell of metal and minerals all around. Bluegrass muzack spills through the ceiling speakers as depressed people slouch in
their seats waiting for meds. The guy at the counter flips through a magazine and sips a plastic cup of what smelled to be beer. Walking up to him, the tag on his coat read JONESY.
"Hey, is Dr. Ben in?" I asked quietly.
The drunkard responded, "Naawww duude. He's ova at theee Rev's. [hiccup] They's meetin Farmer Fred today."
"Farmer Fred?"
"Yeah dude! You know, farmer Fred! He's got the stuff to make the stuff the Doctor and the Rev love so much. Somethin with a ko-ish type name..."
Kosh, i thought. At last it's starting to come in reach. "Thanks Jonesy. I'm gonna head over to the Rev's now."
"Whoa man, how'd you know my name? Oh right, the tag. Haha, gonna join 'em for a little chilsss and smokey smokey, eh?"
I had already left before he got the question out. Some people you just don't wanna deal with.
The trail to the Rev's Church led out of town. The wilderness surrounded the barely trampled path. Hiked about a good mile before a sign approached:
NOW ENTERING THE UNKNOWN
CHURCH INSIDE
The puzzling sign loomed over me as i trekked under it. Manuvering through the hills, a spire seemed to rise from the ground. It was a building, but just a spire. Only about 5 stories tall, the brick tower had markings of some sort of religion on it. One phrase was repeated over and over. I couldn't read it completely, but it looked
like.......fourtwent ywonder.
Ah, I'm here I thought. I hope kosh is worth all this.
A large wooden door blocked the entranceway, so i politely knocked the knocker. A silent moment was followed by a groan of wood shifting. The sanctuary was open, and a soft light glowed out into
the forest.
"Hello young wayfarer, I am the Reverend Jah Jah, preacher of the 42one-der." An omnious voice filled the air.
Whoa, Jah Jah was real after all..."Hi Rev, I'm just here looking for Kosh. This girl in the town told me about it." I mentioned.
"Ah yes, farmer Fred has just arrived with some. We had a visit from the cheeseking eariler today, would you like some?"
"No, I'm just here for kosh. I don't even know what it is."
"Oh my son, you do not know what you crave?! Haha! Well, kosh is a wonderful thing. It gives you inspiration, joy, and above else something to do when there isn't anything else. It brings love, hate, and emotionall together to form something beyond what the human mind can comprehend. Truly, it will mstrbateurmind..."
"So....can i have some?"
"Here, enjoy." A box enters into my palm. "Go back into town now, go back to living the life you once held."
I thanked the good Reverend and took to the trails once more. Holding the box close to my face, my fingers trace around the opening flap. Slowly my finger slides in and i pry open the top. Kosh is finally mine...
Silence.
All you see now is the fallen form of Kompressor, dead on the ground with an opened kosh next to him.
Nothing more, nothing less.