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Lions & Christians (PB) · 01-27-2004, 06:44 PM

so this guy named evan wants to win the lottery so he can go out and do good stuff like open charities and other bullshit like that.

So he goes home and prays to god...

"dear god... please, make me win the lottery. I see so much pain in the world... children without food, the mothers who spent their food stamps on crack.. please, god... help me win the lottery so i can do some actual good in this world"

the next morning evan woke up still poor, but with the faith he had in his god he quit his job and sold his house and gave all his money to the homeless (which he was now a member of)...

so once again, evan prays

"dear god, see? I have nothing but the upmost honest intentions. I want to help, not hurt. Please, help me win the lottery tommorrow"

The next day evan woke up and found that he was being urinated on by high schoolers. When they noticed he was awake they proceeded to beat the shit out of him intill he was crying out his god's name and asking why.

Suddenly, the grey, rainy sky cleared up and one eye appeared in the middle of the sky. Withen a blink their where two eyes... then a nose, and a mouth. The eyes where blue, but besides that their where no defining characteristics in these features...

This face without a face smiled and looked down apon evan saying

"Evan.... buy a fucking lottery ticket already... I can only do so much you whiny little bitch."

the moral of the story is god is a know it all punk.

01-27-2004, 06:44 PM	#1 (permalink)
Lions & Christians (PB) former junky turned junky Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: evidently, here. Posts: 5,827 Thanks: 0 Thanked 15 Times in 3 Posts	shiva and kali so this guy named evan wants to win the lottery so he can go out and do good stuff like open charities and other bullshit like that. So he goes home and prays to god... "dear god... please, make me win the lottery. I see so much pain in the world... children without food, the mothers who spent their food stamps on crack.. please, god... help me win the lottery so i can do some actual good in this world" the next morning evan woke up still poor, but with the faith he had in his god he quit his job and sold his house and gave all his money to the homeless (which he was now a member of)... so once again, evan prays "dear god, see? I have nothing but the upmost honest intentions. I want to help, not hurt. Please, help me win the lottery tommorrow" The next day evan woke up and found that he was being urinated on by high schoolers. When they noticed he was awake they proceeded to beat the shit out of him intill he was crying out his god's name and asking why. Suddenly, the grey, rainy sky cleared up and one eye appeared in the middle of the sky. Withen a blink their where two eyes... then a nose, and a mouth. The eyes where blue, but besides that their where no defining characteristics in these features... This face without a face smiled and looked down apon evan saying "Evan.... buy a fucking lottery ticket already... I can only do so much you whiny little bitch." the moral of the story is god is a know it all punk. __________________ The most dangerous drug on this planet has to be oxygen. A gateway drug to say the least, further more people use without even consideration, not consenting to moderation in the least, and dont even get me started on the withdrawels. the goal of alchemy is to turn lead into gold. to take a substance and combine it with another substance that makes it more than it's origenal worth. in this sense, you really need to start making bronze statues of your pharmacist or local chemist, for they have made gods own medicine, morphine, and in contrast, a shiney rock doesnt seem to compete.