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Burner of trees · 05-02-2009, 10:25 PM

probably should put this in the addiction forum but meh i'd like more people to see it for teh mega-support. so anyways for the last 3 or so years i've gotten quite deep into the opiates and at the beginning it was all swell because well shit, 20mgs of hyrdocodone could get me off for very cheap. now years later i need atleast 140mgs of oxy just to feel normal..

a month ago, i decided i need to quit. i've tried it a few times but was never all that serious about it, but considering the fact my life is pretty much in the same state as it was 3 years ago it really dawned upon me i absolutely HAVE to quit or everything i ever wanted as a person could be placed in jeopardy. the month was hard as i'm sure many of you know..many days were spent thinking about hitting opiates from the back, but somehow i did without them...until today that is. some oxymorphone was around, and being the opie-head i am i just couldn't say no to banging such a wonderful synthesized piece of heaven ...so now here i am right back where i started, kind of.

i just don't really know what to think or say anymore, only a few of my friends understand the severity of the situation and i can't help but feel judged by some of the ones who don't. just recently i have moved in with two good friends of mine who let me stay here rent-free for now, and despite me trying to hide my actions today they found out and now i just hang my head in shame.

i owe two of my dealers money and dont have the funds to pay them back. one has the potential to kill me i believe..

heres the kicker: ive only done herion a couple time, and thankfully i dont have a real solid connect but i know if that was the case it i'd only be worse,,,shit i just don't know what to do anymore. no money, no job as of now, not much support, bills, horrible withdrawls, pretty much shitiness in most faccets of life..back when i started fucking with this shit i always repeated to myself that i basically was not dumb enough to get addicted...damn i couldn't have been more ignorant if i tried. to anyone reading this who hasn't really dabbled with other drugs please STAY THE FUCK AWAY!!

sorry for the general length & it being all over the place but i just needed to get this off my chest, and i know a lot of you guys can definately raise my spirits and whatnot. thanks again guys n u can haz cheeseburg now. excuse me while i get some morphones ready

/

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05-02-2009, 10:25 PM	#1 (permalink)
Burner of trees ya, yo. Join Date: May 2004 Location: where da skeezer be Posts: 5,908 Blog Entries: 1 Thanks: 121 Thanked 119 Times in 58 Posts	addiction rant probably should put this in the addiction forum but meh i'd like more people to see it for teh mega-support. so anyways for the last 3 or so years i've gotten quite deep into the opiates and at the beginning it was all swell because well shit, 20mgs of hyrdocodone could get me off for very cheap. now years later i need atleast 140mgs of oxy just to feel normal.. a month ago, i decided i need to quit. i've tried it a few times but was never all that serious about it, but considering the fact my life is pretty much in the same state as it was 3 years ago it really dawned upon me i absolutely HAVE to quit or everything i ever wanted as a person could be placed in jeopardy. the month was hard as i'm sure many of you know..many days were spent thinking about hitting opiates from the back, but somehow i did without them...until today that is. some oxymorphone was around, and being the opie-head i am i just couldn't say no to banging such a wonderful synthesized piece of heaven ...so now here i am right back where i started, kind of. i just don't really know what to think or say anymore, only a few of my friends understand the severity of the situation and i can't help but feel judged by some of the ones who don't. just recently i have moved in with two good friends of mine who let me stay here rent-free for now, and despite me trying to hide my actions today they found out and now i just hang my head in shame. i owe two of my dealers money and dont have the funds to pay them back. one has the potential to kill me i believe.. heres the kicker: ive only done herion a couple time, and thankfully i dont have a real solid connect but i know if that was the case it i'd only be worse,,,shit i just don't know what to do anymore. no money, no job as of now, not much support, bills, horrible withdrawls, pretty much shitiness in most faccets of life..back when i started fucking with this shit i always repeated to myself that i basically was not dumb enough to get addicted...damn i couldn't have been more ignorant if i tried. to anyone reading this who hasn't really dabbled with other drugs please STAY THE FUCK AWAY!! sorry for the general length & it being all over the place but i just needed to get this off my chest, and i know a lot of you guys can definately raise my spirits and whatnot. thanks again guys n u can haz cheeseburg now. excuse me while i get some morphones ready / ? __________________ Futurama quote of the day: (When I remember) Fry: Man, I thought Ultimate Robot Fighting was real, like pro wrestling, but it turns out it's fixed, like boxing.