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yeah as above, i was leading up in my post to saying that you're not really back at square one, it's important not to brush aside the progress you've made thus far.
also on a probably unrelated note, I've never looked at the period (of about a year) where I was hxc addicted to cockaine (most of a ball per day, every day) as being a "negative" period in my life. I mean all the pissed away cash made paying bills and eating (..) pretty difficult, all the pissed away relationships/friendships, etc. In spite of all that I snorted away, I still look upon it as a positive part of my life. They say what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, so I basically think of my (past?) addiction as a "crash course" in life lessons.
food for thought I guess.
again, good luck. hope things start to brighten up for you a bit soon.
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