Porcelain

Well, to speed a few people up on a couple of things...First, my dad and I started living together last year in October. He started dating this chick in February. I wasn't really the one trying to squeeze myself into an overcrowded situation. In fact, with all the bullshit little things that have been happening since she showed up, I think I've been patient about her presence. I had a talk with my dad about 2 months ago about our agreed upon responsibilities cuz he started asking me to help pay rent on top of all the other things I already pay for. At this point, I don't pay rent but all the other things I help pay for around the house, collectively add up at the end of the month to a hefty sum.

Second, I wish they WOULD go to her place every now and again but she lives in a women's shelter for single mothers and they don't allow visitors there. I would move out but I started a fresh lease at the building recently and I don't wanna get fucked over cuz the place is in mine and my friend's name, not my dad's.

I'm trying to be sympathetic to my dad's situation. I've had situations where I'd care about someone and not realize that I'm making my other loved ones feel neglected or used over it. But I felt like shit last week when it was raining out and I had to take my daughter to kindergarden. She goes for the later half of the day and I usually pick both her and my brother up from school cuz they go to the same one. He had to go see a buddy of his but it was really no rush. I asked him to wait an extra hour so he can give me a drive there and he said no cuz he was already dressed. I had to walk my daughter to school in the rain and my umbrella went inside out mid-way. We got drenched. Then I made another trip with no umbrella to pick both kids up from school. I asked if he'd drive me then but he basically told me he wasn't going to be coming home 'till later. Meanwhile, for his chick, he'll drive one hour each way anytime she wants. It's making me feel resentful not because I see myself as his little child who needs to be babied but because I see myself as his family...as someone who's not only his family but also someone who helps him when he needs it. I could up and leave but then I wonder about what's gonna happen with my brother. I'm 15 years older than him and I practically raised him. Both my parents are idiots who always seemed to have put their children at the butt end of their priorities. I don't want to see them take advantage of my brother the way they did with me.

I don't wanna talk to his GF on the subject cuz she's got attitude problems a lot of the time. Her daughter was born 100% mentally healthy...her face was a little deformed. Because of that, she's always treated her as more special. Her son is an ok kid...he can get loud at times but that doesn't bother me much. It's her daughter...ugh! Once, I saw her kids fighting amongst each other and the son was clearly right but he's the one who got in trouble anyway. I'm not trying to be cold hearted but I don't think you should let your kid get away with murder just because life dealt them a tougher hand. She's very protective of her daughter and I just don't think she'd understand if I started telling her that her kid gets on my nerves and needs to stop touching my shit.

Mikey - I understand that kids are kids. My whole thing is, I refuse to treat a kid like an adorable little moron when I know they have the mental capabilities to control their behavior. My kid is a little bit younger but not by much. She's 4 years old. Very rarely is there an actual medical condition for why kids misbehave. Most of the times, kids will go as far as you let them. Sometimes it's not enough to tell them to stop something. There usually have to be consequences for kids to comprehend that they can't do what they were told not to do. I might have a slightly different mentality on the matter because I spent my childhood in Russia where kids are expected to be more mature than they are here. The point I'm trying to make is that I know an 8 year old is capable of understanding that it's not ok to come into my room if I told her that on several occasions. Also, I believe in being polite. Like I said, I have a kid too. When I take my daughter to someone's house and she plays there, I always wait around for her to help clean up...and I watch her to make sure she's really helping and not just kicking toys under the bed. It's hard work keeping a clean house when you have kids so I would never make someone else's job harder by raising my kid to think it's ok to mess up someone's house and leave.

So far, I think the best advice I got was to put locks on my doors and if any questions arise, I'll be more than glad to provide answers.

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