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I have to say it sounds like your indifference and apathy might be a coverup or a way to avoid feeling your emotions, perhaps something you haven't fully worked through in the past and at some point decided it was easier to just detach from it then to face it, feel it and resolve it. There's nothing wrong with being centered nor is there anything wrong with feeling strong emotions. I'd say the true 'zen' way of living is being perfectly non-attached to attachment. Enjoying life for the fullest of it's riches in terms of emotions and possessions, but also accepting their lack and being able to remain centered in the face of calamity.
What is really sounds like your friends and girlfriend are upset about is your detachment to your own plights has also made you lose compassion for others' plights...and that compassion is essential to most relationships.
Just remember, you can care about money/sex/material things and still be perfectly 'zen'. I do not feel we came into a physical world merely to be tested so we could abandon it. I feel we came here to embrace the physical and all that entails, all the while balancing ourselves between an intense spiritual connection, to where we reside in the middle somewhere, between heaven and earth. To me, that's the truest form of human spirituality out there.
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God appears, and God is light,
To those poor souls who dwell in night;
But does a human form display
To those who dwell in realms of day.
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