|
The blowjob was invented by a man named Siphilus Quagmire. A wealthy man about town, well known. One day while relieving tension in the tea room, he realised he had run short of personal lubricant. He searched his old english mansion top to bottom for something to suffice, curiously finding himself in the kitchen. He noticed a pan of old dripping from the roast the night before. So he sat down on the ole' cooks chair, closed his eyes and proceeded to indulge in a bout of handy pandy. Unaccustomed to the new sensation the dripping had brought, he had not realised the house terrier had strolled in and started sampling the dripping off of his phalic membrane. At first he felt shocked, low, and perverted, but as he halted his initial judgement, he glanced around the kitchen, and let himself slide into and unprecedented amount of gratification.
As the terrier strolled away, satisfied with his salty high fat high protein meal, Siphilus had realised a revolution was about to take place in the sexual realm, a new idea brought to bedrooms and alleyways all over the world, and that night he made the propasal to his wife - Mary Eden. Naturally the bitch ran her mouth and in no time chicks were suckin dick left right and centre. It changed the whole fabric of society.
__________________
Next time you say "I have nothing in common with this person," remember that you have a great deal in common: A few years from now - two years or seventy years, it doesn't make much difference - both of you will have become rotting corpses, then piles of dust, then nothing at all.
 |