Better hope the manager doesn't tell the boss.
I always lied about shit to get out of work. At one job I had to remember not to use the dead relative excuse because I think I had already killed off almost everyone in my extended family to get out of working.
Past hope. Past kindness or consideration. Past justice. Past satisfaction. Past warmth or cold or comfort. Past love. But past surprise? What an endlessly unfolding tedium life would then become.
-Francis Walcott, Deadwood