[Terry]

So I've been running an online business with my stepdad for the last year and the money's been pretty decent. I don't enjoy the work because I have to work with my stepfather, who is overbearing at best, but it beats a 9-5 job, that is until recently.

We had a falling out over some missent merchandise and he wouldn't let it go even when I offered to pay for the stuff we lost, as there is a chance it was my fault. I eventually just said fuck this, pay me my last check and good luck.

I really shot myself in the foot quitting like that, rent is coming up and I'm behind on electricity, but I don't want to work with my family anymore that's for sure.

The guy's decent enough these days. I used to get into a lot of trouble in high school and he'd kick my ass but not to a point that I'd call it abuse or anything. It's just that since then, he and his kids have kind of looked at me and my sister as the "black sheep" but ever since Chelle left the state I've been getting the negative attention. His real son is a shallow, pussy obsessed meathead to be completely honest. He once stole 500 bucks from my stepdad and now they joke about it, whereas I never asked him for cent one since I moved out five years ago, and he's always on my case.

Mostly it's harmless ball breaking but he can say some hurtful shit sometimes with out even thinking twice about what he said. Honestly it's to the point where I want to just not talk to my step family for awhile because whenever I see them I leave feeling drained and pissed off and nothing I say will change his behavior.

Basically I'm freaking because I'm out on my ass again with nothing to show for the effort I put in for the last year, and I'm starting to feel this is my lot in life. I can't ever catch a break or have something go my way and it feels like my anxiety and money worries are going to overwhelm me.

I dunno, I guess I just need some validation to not think I'm a useless waste of space. I should go back to school, I excelled in my writing and classwork at college but I was discouraged by the weekend warrior mentality of the fucking straight out of high school kids whose rich parents foot the bill when I get to be saddled with even more debt once I graduate.

Maybe I should move, or join the Peace Corp, get the fuck out of this town instead of always living in the same rut because I'm too comfortable and scared to try something new.