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After quitting meds almost 3 years ago I learned to accept my fate that I will always be depressed. I know it sucks. I sometimes think God is punishing me or fucking with me. Some people are just going to be depressed no matter what they accomplish or what treatment they do or don't do.
I thought school would ease my depression. I still feel guilty all the time and my anxiety got worse. I keep thinking being in a relationship with a really nice girl would make me happy, but I was much worse when I was in that. She was 100% perfect for me so there is nothing anyone can say or advice that I didn't already take.
The next person who says something like, "there are newer drugs out there and you should talk to your shrink" is going to get their lights punched out by me.
I do sleep every night and always have so you probably have it worse. If it makes you feel better I have only 1 friend IRL.
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