Crazy events in the sexual lifespan

[The SARS Volta]

Sexual experiences that have happened to you that are unforgettable but equally bizarre. May be strange to look back, but will be hilarious when you're old and things don't function as well as they used to--or even the next day, in my case.
This will take balls to admit as I type although there's no way I regret it. In fact the experience was incredible yet far from sexual idealism. And at moments it was just wrong.

This went down last night: A friend is released from jail on a charge which he is proven not guilty. We're celebrating his release at a mutual friend, Jay's house. I'm happy our buddy was acquitted, and even more pleased to see Jay again for the first time in a while.
Jay is intriguing, entertaining and gorgeous; something refreshing to see after months of focusing on work and school thus neglecting any sexual and any social life--he's that guy you can't turn down unless you're not into men at all.
He and I are chatting it up all night, all the while, drinking beer to excess. Jay spits a lot of ditsy/cutesy innuendo, but I act like I don't take it seriously.

Eventually everyone is either passed out or headed home. The booze is gone, and this left me at Jay's, totally wrecked. I asked to crash on a guest bed and he agreed immediately, but Jay wasn't about to have me do so by myself. We inevitably begin messing around, but then I hear:
"This isn't actually a guest room. It's my dead brother's old room".
Awkward. Naturally, I refuse to do anything sexual in deceased bro's bed so we move it over to Jay's room to eliminate a morbid factor.

Finally, we just get it on. There was a tangible urgency for a sex fix between the both of us. So, it is exceptionally passionate, primal and intense. I came like a power-washer multiple times. The sex was easily some of the best I've had. He fucked like a machine and it was mutually enjoyed.
A glowing experience is interrupted by Jay's bedroom door flying open, and his Mom on the other side of it; more intoxicated than we were and enraged. She told him he had to get out of the house and to me--"LEAVE, and take my son with you!" We weren't loud, so I don't know what gave it away.

I fumble to get clothes back on after she disappears, but Jay stops me and tries to reassure me that it's no big deal; "she won't even remember this tomorrow, she's a drunk".
Immediately, I disagree with him and try to get my shit together, but he has different ideas and pushes me back on the bed to finish up, regardless of Mamadukes.
I humored the idea of struggling but it felt too good to do much to resist. Sure enough, his mom comes back upstairs and flips her shit again, and we sprint outside and resume sex in the car. When we were sober enough to drive--it was off to my place to continue the sex-a-thon, where no one was there to call it off.

No doubt, this morning was awkward for him and sore for me. I was all lulz anyhow. Then, he tells me he's 19 and I laugh even harder, but he was serious. I couldn't give a fuck if he's 3 years my junior at this point when we'd already had 6+ hours of epic sex in one night.

[Canuck Wisdom]

Three years is no big deal by 19, especially if its just sex.

[Mafoo]

you just made that dudes year nothing like getting with an older woman to make a dudes confidence swell slightly.

a girl i had been dating for a good while and myself were making out, as was usual, on the couch in her living room. everyone was asleep upstairs and we were both professional sneaky freaks by this stage in the relationship, so we were being pretty quiet. we were starting to get a little carried away and i mustve been doing something right because she was making it pretty clear that she didn't like the way my pants fit me so she starts undoing my belt and the buttons (god damn those buttonfly jeans). i get her naked, my pants are around my ankles, but were still being very quiet. im layed back on the couch enjoying her language skills and shes got her ass kinda up facing away from us. next thing i know i see an elderly woman, illuminated by the faint glow from the tv(we were supposed to be watching a movie), come sliding past and around the corner into the bathroom. aparently grandma was visiting, unbeknownst to myself and her granddaughter. needless to say i buttoned those buttonfly jeans faster than i ever imagined possible. grandma never mentioned anything about seeing her granddaughters rear so maybe she was sleep walking

[The SARS Volta]

Three years is no big deal by 19, especially if its just sex.

Agreed, it wasn't an issue. Just a first.

[Blue_Dolphin]

Wow girl! What a night! Kinda creepy about the dead brother though. haha! So what's going on now? Is his mother batshit crazy or are things cool?

[SageTree]

One time my wife and I were on to of the Chief, which is in Squamish BC, and it the second largest granite monolith in the world, as its said.

We it was a spring day and the sun was so warm.

There weren't but two people we passed going down as we went up, so it was pretty secluded for the day, which came into my factorization of good taste, when we got to the second peak, I was feeling pretty horny.

I popped the suggestion to my Wife that we go over to one of the more enclosed areas on the edge and share love. She was game of course.

So here we are. My wife bent over with her hand supporting her on a tree trunk with her pants around her ankles and me behind her thrusting away, over looking the Howe Sound 2300 ft above sea level, and there isn't a tree in front of us.

What should happen but a plane, single engine dealy, flies by. Don't really think much of it.

Then I hear the plane again....this can only mean one thing.

I could see the freaking whites of their eyes each time they passed two more times after that!!!

We both just waved since it was obvious one of them bad binoculars pointed at us, and we kept on task.

The sex is always great when we are outside, the sun warming us and the sun shining on my Ladies beautiful breast back and hips.

We just laughed about it and wished them well and hope they enjoyed our impromptu performance.


Sage

We were on the right side of the second peak, just beside the big shadow in the middle of the second and third peaks.

The town below

A nice profile


How's that for a commercial! Hey atleast I didn't include accommodation links to the fantastic hostel 3 kms away!

[Blue_Dolphin]

LOL!

Nice, Sage!

[SageTree]

What's that song about take it on the run baby?

How 'bout on a hike ?

[Blue_Dolphin]

Haha! Thats one of my favorite songs to sing on Rockband.

I don't really have any crazy stories to tell about. When one happens, I'll let you guys know.

[SageTree]

I think you get it on pretty regular for a married couple with kids.

That is pretty freakay!

[The SARS Volta]

Wow girl! What a night! Kinda creepy about the dead brother though. haha! So what's going on now? Is his mother batshit crazy or are things cool?

His mom seems permanently crazy. He hasn't been let back to his house yet, but she's been known to kick him out and let him back after no more than a few days.

And yep, the dead brother's room component was extremely strange, but at least I found out before we boned and not during or after. It was a hell of a night.

[Canuck Wisdom]

That sounds pretty crazy, kicking someone out for having sex...

[The Rev]

I remember taking my girlfriend, right after I'd dropped out of High School, up to the school on a weekend. We fucked on the ground right outside the library. This seemed like a rebellious gesture at the time, but now it's just lulz.

BTW, Sars, your story gave me a woodrow.



The Rev

[The SARS Volta]

That sounds pretty crazy, kicking someone out for having sex...

We both remarked on that. I would understand if we were 15, but he's 19 and I'm 22. Menopause maybe?

[The SARS Volta]

BTW, Sars, your story gave me a woodrow.


The Rev

[turmaline]

to everyone about everything

[SageTree]

woodrow

In all seriousness, I think I about lost it when Wilson jumped ship too, we all know he couldn't take it anymore! He's all,'Shit yo, I could swim for years!' Arrogant bastard running out of Tom-ass like that.

[The SARS Volta]

madface? hmm, anger-fueled sex can lead to some interesting over-the-top shit, i suppose

[ColtEtish]

I don't have any stories that are that good, I almost had a 4 some once but one girl backed out.

I havn't had intercourse since like late may or early june. I don't socialize very much.

[Sir-Ex]

Um. hmmm.. craziest sex story? I mean there are my many fetishes but I wouldn't consider that very crazy. So I dunno about craziest but a funny one comes to mind. In Scotland whilst traveling, me and my girl spent the day whatever blah blah, and then late in the night in the hostel we're lying together in the bottom half of a bunk.

We get horny. And so we decide that.. well we just can't wait for this one so we'll be really quiet. Well we do pretty good, nice and quiet and it's feeling great at the same time, no one's the wiser. But then later we roll over, girl gets on top, and starts working it some more. And more and she's still nice and quiet. But then she starts getting close and I feel her getting close. I'm getting excited to see how she handles this and stays quiet. She builds and builds and BAM! I she starts grinding me to fuck and to my amazement is still quiet!

I'm thinking 'wow she's good at this hahaha' chuckling to myself that we got away with this and it was great.


Well then suddenly she can't contain it and this like.. mangled god damned sound bursts out of her like, "eeeyoooooeeeyyyyyii iioooohhh!!!!!" super loud and as soon as that's done she quickly collapses and lies flat and pretends nothing happened.

I couldn't help but start chuckling out loud. There were 14 other people in that room and I dunno what else that sound could mean. Perhaps in kindness no one said anything.