Nederland and Deutchland

[farmergiles]

I`m going on holiday to Germany driving through Holland with a friend. We`re gonna drive round the Nürburgring then go camping in the Black Forest for a week or so.

I`m really looking forward to it, never been to any of these places before.

It`s gonna be really hard to not keep saying Achtung! and Gott in Himmell! and other choice phrases that I`ve learnt from war movies as this has been my major exposure to German culture up to now.

Anyone got any coffeeshop recommendations? We`ll probably be going through Rotterdam but we could divert to Amsterdam.

[Captain Cannabis]

ive not been yet but i am in the neighbourhood. thinking about going soon maybe to that part of europe

[farmergiles]

The South West of Germany`s supposed to be real nice. Some of the cities are supposed to be cool (Berlin, Hamburg) but we havn`t got loads of cash so we`re gonna stick to the countryside.

[CBCOOLEST]

As far as I know there are quiet some issues with DE and NL people
So here are some tips:
1. Never ever talk to germans about NL people or viceversa. They are in "comeptition" all the time about everything
2. Never say to a NL guy his language sound like german language cause he might get very angry
3. Watch out if they ask you about thei clothes, music etc If you say the wrong things you might get out with a friendly hmmm or with your head cracked (friends experience)
These would be the 3 major things
Good Luck and be careful what you say over there, because if you say the wrong things you might have some problems

[farmergiles]

Oh OK. I know quite a few dutchys they all seem really mellow although that`s probably `cos I met them at music festivals and stuff. The Dutch language is completely incomprehensible but everyone there speaks english anyway.

I`m really into Detroit techno which is very popular in Germany (Tresor etc) but we`ll be staying away from major cities anyway except maybe Cologne and Frankfurt.

I`m always real cautious when I`n not in my own backyard, I find if you treat people with respect you`re usually OK.

[Dex]

I live in Mannheim. Go to Heidelberg if you go anywhere in Germany. It's about 45 mins out of frankfurt.

[Jimmy Coonan]

Yea Heidelberg's nice. If you're in the Nuernberg area, Bamberg and Wuerzburg are good cities to visit. I lived in Wuerzburg for a year and visited Bamberg four or five times. Both very beautiful, great castle in Wuerzburg, lots of historic stuff in Bamberg. Decent number of kneipes (bars) in both too, but I suppose every German city's good for that. Lots of students to drink with in Wuerz.

[JayDonC]

If you go to 'Dam, you have to visit the new Greenhouse coffeshop in Haarlem. It is amazing, bring your own buds though (expensive). Gotta visit Grey Area too, they had OG Kush when I was there.

[farmergiles]

I think we`ll be going to Rotterdam rather than Amsterdam (though we may change the plan) but I`ll bear what you said about asking for fresh local buds in mind Roach.
Dunno what they think about Ramstein, the Dutch that I know are into really hard techno mostly. Do you like DAF Roach?

As far as the coffeshops go I think we`ll try the ones that are affiliated with seedbanks (and have won cannabis cups) like Sensi and (yes JayDonc) Greenhouse, apparently the prices in Rotterdam tend to be better, less tourists.

Cheers for the suggestions of places to visit folks, I`ll bear them in mind although we`re planning on sticking to the countryside rather than towns and cities really.

Anyone done any camping in Germany?

[farmergiles]

Well in the end we got the Eurotunnel from Folkstone to Calais. Set off at 11pm, made it to Folkestone about 3.30 am which is pretty good going as in the UK we have loads of roadworks with evil speed averaging traffic cameras. Got on a train at about 4.30 and were in France 40 mins later.
The Eurotunnel is way cool (when it`s not on fire).

Straight into Belgium. Now I don`t know if anyone has ever been to Belgium but for my money it has to be the most god awful looking place I`ve ever seen. 2 world wars were (extensively) fought here. It`s flat as a pancake, makes me agrophobic. Everything looks dirty and run down and square. The people all look like they`re in a paedophile ring. Never actually talked to anyone as we never got out of the car. No apologies if there are any Belgian Yahookans, emigrate asap and tell no-one would be my advice.
I`m just telling my friend to drive faster whilst occasionally reminding him to drive on the right. I don`t know how many times on this holiday I told him to drive on the right.

Now into Holland. Not actually sure what time it is as we`re such fuckwits we have no idea of the time zones but the traffic is getting really busy so I assume it`s rush hour. People in Holland have a very different driving style to the UK. They have perfect lane discipline (they always pull into the slow lane unless they`re actually overtaking something- Yanks don`t do this on the freeway do you? You can drive in any lane?) and generally drive legally but apart from that are maniacs.
My friend`s driving is beginning to concern me- I keep having to stop him from sideswiping cars as he isn`t checking his blind spot on the right (it`s more difficult if your car is wrong handed).
Holland looks much nicer than Belgium. Although basically the countryside is the same (flat as a pancake) it doesn`t look as run down and the people don`t look like extras from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. There is loads of concrete everywhere- Holland is largely reclaimed from the sea- there are dams and canals and stuff everywhere. In fact the whole landscape is man made but it looks busy and cheerful.

I keep expecting the traffic to let up but it doesn`t. It`s moving at a good pace but it`s very busy. I have an insufficiently detailed map of Europe and some printouts I made from googlemaps. Don`t trust googlemaps. We hit Rotterdam. The plan is to find the campsite (I`ve rang ahead to make sure we`ve got a pitch for our tents), get tents up then hit town and get stoned.

to be continued.....

[Peace seeker]

yeah Belgium sucks!

I was driving from London down to Greece a few yrs back. As soon as the ferry hit Belgium, i was like wtf is this??? It stunk like beer and piss. Dirty place. Plus belgians do look like pedophiles...

They ahve a weird look in their eyes.


Holland is MUCH nicer. Clean, organised and people do obey the traffic laws.


so what happend next FG???

I wanna hear some Nyrbouring stories

[Štulic]

Good stuff... I wanna hear what you think of Germany too.

[Cerebro]

Black Forest should be awesome.

[farmergiles]

So we come screaming off the motorway (or whatever they`re called in Holland) and land in a massive traffic jam in Rotterdam. My maps don`t match up with reality. We keep taking wrong turns.
Now the car is a spanking new BMW135i (pic shows German car, ours has the driver on the other side but apart from that it`s identical). A high performance car with a big engine. We`ve been hammering it on the way here then pulled into heavy traffic with no chance to get some air over the radiator. I watch the temp creeping up. 120. 125. The clutch is getting hot as well, I can smell it.
I think it`s funny, high performance cars are so expensive and impractical, we`ve got insurance but my friend is freaking out `cos his new toy is gonna explode before we even get it back to it`s home in the land of the Bratwurst. Creeping up to 130- wow this is way hotter than I`ve ever seen a car get without exploding. It`s just starting to run badly when we get on the street with the campsite (Kanaalweg- I love Dutch names). We park up and go into reception.

"Sorry we`re full" says the receptionist in perfect English. What! I rang ahead to book and everything. I don`t lose my rag or anything but despite my insistence of having already booked they are adamant they have no space. I ask them where the nearest other campsite is and they seem to think it`s in Delft but their directions are vague.

I go back to the car. My friend has just driven 600 miles non- stop and he`s feeling a little fragile these days at the best of times. His mind has completely gone. It`s still early (middayish) so I suggest we leave the car here and go into town to get a bite to eat, check out the town and find our bearings a little.

We walk into the centre (it`s not far) and find ourselves in the red light/ coffee shop area. Dutch takeaway food all looks universally awful but I manage to find a reasonably hygienic bakers and get us some cheese and ham croissants. My friend doesn`t want to eat he`s so wired but I bully him into it.

I go into a corner shop to score some Lucky Strikes. I make the mistake of asking for 20. A pack of twenty is 1 pack in Holland (and most of Europe, I should have known better. The North African looking shopkeeper mocks my touristness in a friendly way.

A beat looking pro comes up to me and bums a cigarette. I give her a Lucky. "Looking for anything?" she asks. "No" I reply, watching her pimp watching us from the other side of the street.

We go to the Greenhouse cafe. The cafe has a little green notice in the window indicating (as far as I can tell) that the premises are licensed to sell ganja.

The bloke behind the bar is a bit shirty at first. I ask to see the menu. He says they don`t have one. I ask what they have. NL, Eidelweiss, Polm and Nepali all at E7 a gram. Not cheap but I`d heard Greenhouse were quality but expensive. I think fuck it and by 2g of Eidelweiss and another 2 of Nepali.
Now I`ve read that in Holland nowadays you can`t smoke tobacco indoors but you can smoke ganja. I ask the dude if he minds me rolling up. He`s mellowed a bit now and invites me to be his guest, gives me some papers and roach card. I build a pure Eidelweiss number.

The dude and a local who is hanging out there look at me bog eyed. "What are you doing with that joint?" asks the local. I explain what I`d gathered about smoking in Holland. They explain that that`s not the case, you can have a seperate smoking room in a cafe or bar but otherwise both ganja and tobacco are disallowed and they havn`t the resources to set one up. They say it`s really bad for business as people don`t come to hang out anymore. The local suggests I smoke it on the street outside but I decide to be cool and wait. They can`t believe anyone makes joints without tobacco, the local makes some comment about crazy Americans.

We hang out and chat for a while- they`re pretty mellow really. They confirm the nearest other campsite is near Delft but the can`t manage to direct me in a way that I can get my head round. We say goodbye.

We wander around town and go to the tourist info. They give us some phone numbers for campsites. We go back to the car.

All the Dutch are polite and helpful but often strangely humourless. For instance if you come to zebra crossing and a car stops for you and you wave they just look at you as if you are mad- "why is that crazy tourist thanking me when he`s got right of way?". Everyone dresses very frumpily in muted colours. Some of the ladies are good looking in a kind of Nordic estuary- dwelling sort of way though. Or maybe that`s just me.

I observe a Japanese tourist. She is obviously lost, standing on a corner holding a map the wrong way up. A Dutchy walks straight up to her to give her directions without being asked. I file this away for future reference. In most places I`ve been to standing on a corner with a tourist map looking lost will get you mugged but not in Holland. As I found out the same thing works in Germany.

We get back to the car. I get my phone out to call the campsite in Delft. My phone has gone dead. The car charger won`t work. My friend has now completely lost it, fatigue, alienation, lack of food. He`s doing my head in. I pull out the Eidelweiss reefer and spark it up. I hadn`t smoked for about a month before this. Blam! Very nice. My friend is no longer doing my head in, I feel renewed. We decide to drive to Delft anyway. I just randomly direct in circles to keep my friend busy and play with the phone and charger until I get it working. The campsite give me directions and tell me there`s plenty room.
I skin up again on the way.

We get to the campsite. The receptionist is drop dead gorgeous, she`s laughing at how stoned I am, I`m laughing back at how gorgeous she is. We pitch tents. It starts raining real hard but it`s warm. There`s a dual carriageway and some canals bordering the campsite but then again there`s a dual carriageway and canals everywhere in Holland.

After putting our tents up we walk into Delft to find a supermarket (or whatever they`re called in Holland). In town all the cars are tiny, there are loads of people cycling. Everyone has totally fucked bikes that are like 100yrs old or something. I think if you had a Cannondale with full XTR groupset or whatever everyone would piss themselves laughing. There are loads of trams as well.
All the trams, barges, cycles and cars seem to integrate perfectly although I keep nearly getting run over.
We score some food and get back to the campsite and get really stoned. Both the grass and the hash are excellent. You aren`t supposed to smoke in Holland in public but it`s pissing down and we don`t give a fuck by this point. Nobody notices/cares. We crawl into our tents and pass out.

To be continued....

[stuey2dope]

Nice read...

I'm going back to Amsterdam on Oct 12th For a few days. Cant fucking wait.
Think I prefer the hotel option over camping though. Is the weather shitty over there right now?

Whats the deal witht he coffee shops? i've read a bit online and the general idea I got was the most of the places are equiped with side places to smoke in since the chnages come in. i fucking hope so.

Come on....

[AdmBmb]

good read, thanks.

[Captain Cannabis]

i laughed out loud at your comment about the bikes

my friend recently went there and took a picture of a bike rack and was asking about it. they don't even have gear shifters just a single gear. i guess thats all you need if its flat right?

[farmergiles]

Originally Posted by Stuey2dope

I'm going back to Amsterdam on Oct 12th For a few days. Cant fucking wait.
Think I prefer the hotel option over camping though. Is the weather shitty over there right now?

Whats the deal witht he coffee shops? i've read a bit online and the general idea I got was the most of the places are equiped with side places to smoke in since the chnages come in. i fucking hope so.

I think the coffeshops in Amstredam may be better equipped to cater for tourists although some in Rotterdam do allow smoking on premises -illegally. Apparently what I`ve read on t`nets about being allowed to smoke pure grass indoors still is bollocks. If the shop gets caught out 3 times they get shut down. That`s w2hat the people running the coffeeshops said anyway.

It rained on and off in Holland the whole time we were there. But then it rains a lot in Holland normally.

[farmergiles]

Originally Posted by Captain Cannabis

my friend recently went there and took a picture of a bike rack and was asking about it. they don't even have gear shifters just a single gear. i guess thats all you need if its flat right?

Damn right, flattest place I`ve ever been to! They`ve got style though the cyclists in Holland. They ride like they learnt to cycle before they could walk. And people cycle wearing full evening dress and stuff. It`s cool. I rabidly endorse cycling.