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08-24-2009, 10:00 PM
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#1 (permalink)
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Join Date: Nov 2008
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so let me tell YOU about the crazy lady that ripped me off
grocery store. 9 30 am. bacon, still drunk
i approach the cashier. a lady is in line in front of me. she smelled of elderberries i thought. blue wool sweater, a vibe of a cat filled house filled with decorative bowls. yes, many. damn that jysk. not even a real word.
im stunned as im snapped out of my feline filled thoughts when she says "you dear look exactly like my son"
well fuck me, there goes my chance at hittin it.
"well your son must be one handsome young fellow" i say modestly.
she smiles and nods "yeeeeeeeeeess". her voice was like a leamers cry when the moon is full on a dark winters eve.
then she asks me for a favor. i ask what'tis.
part two coming next time.
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formality known as higherlearner84, la coka nostra and finding balance.
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08-24-2009, 10:02 PM
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#2 (permalink)
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: the anguish of anticipated transformation
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this has happened to me, the lady then asked me to pay for her groceries.. hag
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PLUR
Originally Posted by verklingen
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instead of setting out to connect all the dots, the intent of zen is seeing the dots, letting them connect and then seeing how oneself connects to them.
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"For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return."
"Knowledge speaks, wisdom listens" Hendrix
"A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger"- words to live by
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08-24-2009, 10:07 PM
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#3 (permalink)
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: 514
Posts: 5,187
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where you grocery shopping, the fuckin city market ?
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08-24-2009, 10:09 PM
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#4 (permalink)
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Scam City, NC
Posts: 16,909
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is this like a choose your own adventure thread?
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Originally Posted by Mercury
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i've struck the absolute perfect balance between gay and smart
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08-24-2009, 10:21 PM
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#5 (permalink)
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Tha 602, PhX
Posts: 1,393
Thanks: 24
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turn to page 32 plz
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08-24-2009, 10:28 PM
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#6 (permalink)
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: in the wild
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Your friend Marco pops out behind you and slaps you on the back.
"Hey, you lost in the clouds, there, buddy?"
You sigh, turn away from the cellar door from whence you thought you heard tapping, and walk away.
THE END.
those fucking choose your own adventures sucked so much asshole. there were never any really good endings.
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08-25-2009, 01:05 AM
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#7 (permalink)
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 1,798
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weird you say that cause this dude marco i know went crazy and swam out to sea a few weeks ago
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Warning:This users signatures contain one or more chemicals known to the state of California to cause cancer, birth defects and other reproductive harm. Wash eyeballs after reading.
"one small bump for man, one giant line for man kind"
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Originally Posted by Canuck Wisdom
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No yahookans take this time to all go out and do shittastic shit missions to tell other yahookans about hung-over tommorow morning, while smoking a bong in our PJs and recovering together drinking water.
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08-25-2009, 01:12 AM
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#8 (permalink)
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Join Date: Sep 2007
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Like, tried to swim to the mainland? 
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Originally Posted by Geeno
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so in my eyes it seems like the banishment of photoshops were like throwing out the whole harvest because of one bad plant. That mentality only creates animosity among those who were compliant with a mutually agreed code of decency.
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08-25-2009, 02:06 AM
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#9 (permalink)
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Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: \D:/
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im suprised that im begging like a little bird in the mother nest right now for more of this taboo stTORrYYrYYy OOoooOoOO
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08-25-2009, 02:30 PM
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#10 (permalink)
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 1,798
Thanks: 56
Thanked 58 Times in 43 Posts
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__________________
Warning:This users signatures contain one or more chemicals known to the state of California to cause cancer, birth defects and other reproductive harm. Wash eyeballs after reading.
"one small bump for man, one giant line for man kind"
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Originally Posted by Canuck Wisdom
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No yahookans take this time to all go out and do shittastic shit missions to tell other yahookans about hung-over tommorow morning, while smoking a bong in our PJs and recovering together drinking water.
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08-25-2009, 02:34 PM
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#11 (permalink)
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Missoula, Montana
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Originally Posted by stonerkid
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well him and this other dude johnny where at this beach to surf but marko was slowly loosing it up until then, like in the car on the way there he was like taking of his clothes and shit. well the get to the water and there chillin on there boards and marko says to johnny "dude my mom called! theres a tsunami coming from korea!" and strips of his clothes ditches his board and starts swimmin out to sea! then johnny swims back in with both boards and is all flippin out on the beach and somehow the rescue copter gets called and the pluck him outta the bay and dump him back on the beach but naked
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Then you went down on him like a circus seal?
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Seek not the favor of the multitude; it is seldom got by honest and lawful means. But seek the testimony of few; and number not voices, but weigh them.
-Immanuel Kant
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08-25-2009, 02:34 PM
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#12 (permalink)
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 984
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Hahaha!
I'm so on the crazy ladies side!
For the fact that she knew what she was doing.
finish the story.
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08-25-2009, 02:35 PM
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#13 (permalink)
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Missoula, Montana
Posts: 3,333
Thanks: 0
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^I wish she would go down on me like a circus seal
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Seek not the favor of the multitude; it is seldom got by honest and lawful means. But seek the testimony of few; and number not voices, but weigh them.
-Immanuel Kant
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08-25-2009, 02:35 PM
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#14 (permalink)
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Big khahuna Burger
Posts: 6,153
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Originally Posted by stonerkid
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well him and this other dude johnny where at this beach to surf but marko was slowly loosing it up until then, like in the car on the way there he was like taking of his clothes and shit. well the get to the water and there chillin on there boards and marko says to johnny "dude my mom called! theres a tsunami coming from korea!" and strips of his clothes ditches his board and starts swimmin out to sea! then johnny swims back in with both boards and is all flippin out on the beach and somehow the rescue copter gets called and the pluck him outta the bay and dump him back on the beach but naked
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That's really crazy.
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Originally Posted by The SARS Volta
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you're my ideal girl too, osirus 
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Originally Posted by Mя. Gяiєvєs
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wake up, call some girl you know, give her the sob story, get some and get fed... it surprisingly works more often than you would think... its the whole motherly instinct thing...
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ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ
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08-25-2009, 02:37 PM
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#15 (permalink)
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 984
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Originally Posted by Terry
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^I wish she would go down on me like a circus seal
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me!?
haha
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08-25-2009, 02:39 PM
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#16 (permalink)
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Missoula, Montana
Posts: 3,333
Thanks: 0
Thanked 303 Times in 213 Posts
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 loooooooooooool
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Seek not the favor of the multitude; it is seldom got by honest and lawful means. But seek the testimony of few; and number not voices, but weigh them.
-Immanuel Kant
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08-25-2009, 02:41 PM
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#17 (permalink)
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 984
Thanks: 306
Thanked 300 Times in 199 Posts
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oh TERRRRRIEEEE!
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08-25-2009, 02:42 PM
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#18 (permalink)
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 1,798
Thanks: 56
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Originally Posted by osirus2020
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That's really crazy.
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yeha like they sent him to oahu for a psych evaluation a few weeks ago but i heard hes pretty much all better just an episode kinda thing. crazy shit thou man, we all thought we lost marko
__________________
Warning:This users signatures contain one or more chemicals known to the state of California to cause cancer, birth defects and other reproductive harm. Wash eyeballs after reading.
"one small bump for man, one giant line for man kind"
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Originally Posted by Canuck Wisdom
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No yahookans take this time to all go out and do shittastic shit missions to tell other yahookans about hung-over tommorow morning, while smoking a bong in our PJs and recovering together drinking water.
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08-25-2009, 06:40 PM
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#19 (permalink)
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: NEast
Posts: 141
Thanks: 107
Thanked 38 Times in 19 Posts
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the suspense is killing me
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Originally Posted by Mercury
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I like skinny girls. Flat chested, flat butted, big nosed, buck toothed, pale skinned and frizzy haired? I still find sex appeal in that.
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08-25-2009, 06:46 PM
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#20 (permalink)
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: NJ
Posts: 1,070
Thanks: 330
Thanked 427 Times in 304 Posts
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Swimming out into a bay doesn't sound that crazy.
Swimming straight out into the ocean, little crazy.
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You are beautiful.
"The people I got to know—aboriginal people in Malaysia,...they enjoyed life, they lived life. Life did not live them, as happens to us."
-Robert Wolff
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