My friend isn't himself.

badgoalie85 · 03-01-2009, 02:18 AM

It's pretty simple to explain really.

My friend's girlfriend broke up with him about 6 months ago. She started dating her ex boyfriend about 2 months after that. Now they are engaged.

He's got an addictive personality, and already has problems with alcohol abuse.

Now he's turned to heroin. He tried it about a month ago and has already become addicted.

How to help?

Grieves · 03-01-2009, 04:34 AM

be a rock for him, sympathetic but not pitying, but he is on a road that only he must travel on...offer advice in the form of distraction...Don't try to froce ideas onto him because he needs clarity rather than confusion...If things get to far distance may be tough but how much breath do you want to waste on deaf ears...

Mafoo · 03-01-2009, 12:01 PM

is he in danger of withdrawing from normal life? or is he still functioning day to day?

try being the person he can talk to about whatever, i know for us guys its kinda hard to talk about emotional stuff but it always helps to air out the shit thats on ones mind. the drugs/ alcohol are a problem but if you can help him realize what hes doing and how hes got alot to look forward to maybe hell see the danger hes in. sometimes people just need an outlet so maybe you can help him find something beside drugs

tough spot youre in there goalie, i share your pain though

**SageTree** · 03-02-2009, 11:00 AM

Is there a root to his addictive personality, something he wants to cover up and hide from?

Herion feels good, there is no two ways about that. But it's a bad road to walk down.

Trying to stay in his life, be a good influence by being yourself, and yes try to see if he'll go do other things. I have a friend who has been on with drawl meds for 1 year and won't be off them till 2010, the more he is 'addicted' the longer the whole thing takes to kick. Just try being supportive and none judgemental.

Good luck and prayers,
Sage

**SageTree** · 03-05-2009, 10:28 AM

How has it been going man?

Dozer McDozer · 03-05-2009, 10:45 AM

Grieves advice sounds pretty solid. for him to get outta that place he needs to see someone down the road ya know. he could get lost if not for you.

hope it goes well man.

Dezzy · 03-05-2009, 05:14 PM

tell him to get on suboxone. Your friend is doing the H because he doesnt feel like him self with out her and off course makes you feel good. Ive been trying to kick a 5 year habit for the past 6 or so months and its starting to get easier especially with the subs. Its a miracle drug and is way better for him then say methadone. I feel like i dont really need the subs anymore but they help me feel like myself again which is hard to remember who i was. The subs will be helpful because everybody i know says they work for depression and anxiety. Dont know what im saying just try to get him off the shit because 5+ years and thousands upon thousands of dollars and it aint worth it.

catastrophe · 03-05-2009, 05:27 PM

Sooo many people in my town, especially and directly talking about the craze of the freshmen/sophomores in grade right now are all addicted to heroin and are even beginning to shoot it up regularly. A smoking friend of mine has a younger brother in 9th grade who, just about two weeks ago overdosed from shooting up. He was rushed to the hospital and died but was revived and is now in a detox program. Shit's fucked up when pretty much everyone you know has tried and started doing heroin in the past six months. I say there's a problem with the school system and this proves it lol

turmaline · 03-05-2009, 05:37 PM

I'll do my duty and just hope your situation/friends situation gets better. Sorry you are going through this...worrying about the ones you care for sucks.

**SageTree** · 03-05-2009, 05:54 PM

Originally Posted by Dezzy

tell him to get on suboxone. Your friend is doing the H because he doesnt feel like him self with out her and off course makes you feel good. Ive been trying to kick a 5 year habit for the past 6 or so months and its starting to get easier especially with the subs. Its a miracle drug and is way better for him then say methadone. I feel like i dont really need the subs anymore but they help me feel like myself again which is hard to remember who i was. The subs will be helpful because everybody i know says they work for depression and anxiety. Dont know what im saying just try to get him off the shit because 5+ years and thousands upon thousands of dollars and it aint worth it.

I have a friend who takes these. I mentioned it earlier. He has tried to kick H a million, literally, times, and he proclaims these pills. There's my two cents.

tedkennedy · 03-05-2009, 06:01 PM

Originally Posted by Dezzy

The subs will be helpful because everybody i know says they work for depression and anxiety. .

well anything that is an opiate or acts like an opiate would treat depression and anxiety.

suboxone is good because its like a more benign form of opiate but i wouldnt suggest taking a drug that is meant for hardcore addicts who are physically addicted and dont want or literally cannot stop using drugs so they are put on suboxone maintenance.

badgoalie85 · 03-05-2009, 06:03 PM

Originally Posted by SageTree

How has it been going man?

it's going...i'd actually prefer just to read what people have to say i'm not usually one to talk about this sort of thing

rest assured all responses are appreciated.

tedkennedy · 03-05-2009, 06:06 PM

^ your friend needs to be the one to decide whether he has a drug problem and if he wants to change.

id just ask him whats up, is he depressed, is he using alot of H, does he have a problem and just re-affirm that you are a supportive friend.

FineazPR · 03-06-2009, 07:25 AM

Be his sounding board, be sincere, be honest, and then let him do what he is gonna do. Too bad you cannot save someone from himself and right now he is his own WORST enemy. It sounds like he is suffering from a brokenheart, and turning to something like Heroin is not the wisest thing to do, but he won't see that for some time. Prepare yourself..its gonna get HOrrible b4 it gets any better. Good luck wit dat!

Lee_Eagle_Eyes · 03-09-2009, 07:08 PM

I recommend the whole "tough love" approach.

You can't stop him from using heroin but you can let him know you are not cool with it and that it is killing your friendship. You can also refuse to shelter him or associate with him until he stops using after you tell him that heroin has no place in your friendship. It will be very difficult for you to do but actions always, always, always speak louder than words.

I have a cousin who is perpetually recovering from heroin. "Tough love" was the only thing that worked and continues to be the only thing that does work.

My thoughts and hopes are with you and your friend.

CatalanZion · 04-05-2009, 03:00 AM

Stick by your friend as much as you can, he is now in another world. Heroin addiction is a living nightmare. He will develop a whole new circle of "friends", other users, who are also part of his new world.

You have to remain his link to the real world, Only he can decide when he wants to come back, but if you are there for him when he needs you, the real world will be a lot less lonely place for him.

If he is addicted as you say, just try and stick by him, and be there when he asks for help.

Good luck, and tell him it will get better!!