Thoughts on marriage?

Cerpin Taxt · 03-06-2008, 02:39 PM

No particular reason, just had a discussion with a friend about the 50% divorce rate and on getting married. What are your thoughts?

Me personally, I think that when people DO get married, it should be when they are at the point where they both know for a fact that any fight they get into isnt one that deals with the foundations of the relationship and would therefore be 'worth' breaking up over...

A marriage should be a right of passage for couples who HAVE put in the effort to fix things that have inevitably come up and are simply compatable enough to do so.

Idealist?

№1 · 03-06-2008, 02:45 PM

Marriage is a chattel agreement to show ownership of another person, it has absolutely nothing to do with how one feels about another. Think about it, if you're committed to one person, why would you need a binding legal document to make sure one of them can't just leave, your heart should be the thing keeping you there not your lawyer.

Flamingnun · 03-06-2008, 02:51 PM

Marriage is nothing outside of religion. I'm not religious, therefore i can manage relationships without some invisible contract.

Edit: or some contract that entitles some ho' to half my estate.

**Canuck Wisdom** · 03-06-2008, 03:06 PM

I agree with all of the posts pretty much. I want to get married, and besides the legal benefits, the only thing that would make me feel different from how No1 feels is that it is a contract and statement in the sight of society, god and one another, a tradition of commitment and shared value.

Cambium · 03-06-2008, 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by №1

Marriage is a chattel agreement to show ownership of another person, it has absolutely nothing to do with how one feels about another. Think about it, if you're committed to one person, why would you need a binding legal document to make sure one of them can't just leave, your heart should be the thing keeping you there not your lawyer.

Well said Nº1

BearsysRevenge · 03-06-2008, 09:50 PM

My sentiments on marriage, to a T.

**Bud Head** · 03-07-2008, 10:02 AM

After seven years it's a legal bond any way. Even with out the paper certificate

AnimalLover420 · 03-07-2008, 10:28 AM

I think it's overrated. People get all starry-eyed at the thought of a wedding and end up marrying people they really don't want to be with for a lifetime. My man and I have been together for over 5 years now, and everyone is CONSTANTLY on our nuts about when we're going to tie the knot. But we're in no rush. Every married couple we talk to tells us to take our time and make absolutely sure we belong together before taking that final step. And what's funny is that we are pretty sure we want to stay together for as long as we're alive, but I still see no need for an elaborate (and costly) way of announcing to the world that we're together. Maybe someday we will, but for now we're happy living in sin.

**Canuck Wisdom** · 03-07-2008, 10:32 AM

Maybe I'm some sort of romantic

It isn't something I want to miss.

AnimalLover420 · 03-07-2008, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Canuck Wisdom

Maybe I'm some sort of romantic

It isn't something I want to miss.

Don't get me wrong, I haven't forgotten about the fantasies of wedding gowns, flowers, bridesmaids, and honeymoons that I had as a little girl. I just have a sense of how much weddings cost now that I'm an adult and it fucking sucks. I'm not the type of person to sit around waiting for a handout from my parents, I'd like my wedding to be something my husband and I paid for ourselves. So I'm probably just saying it's not important because in reality, I'm too broke to have one whether I wanted to or not.

**Canuck Wisdom** · 03-07-2008, 10:42 AM

I don't give a shit about weddings really. I thought we were talking about marriage. (sry to be brazen, trying to make a point). I'm to shy/cheap to care about a nice wedding.

Micknjo · 03-14-2008, 12:13 AM

me and my significant other just got married!

spent our honeymoon blazed in the forrest, was great!
dunno if that helps anyone, but i just wanted to say it

greenvibrance · 04-03-2008, 01:57 PM

getting married...well,I'll be happy if it happens and happy if doesn't....I'm cool with it....

Mental · 04-03-2008, 02:04 PM

I've been with my girl for 9yrs now? I proposed 2yrs into the relationship, and that was enough. I don't feel the need to be married. Some little piece of paper doesn't change who/what we are to each other. And without that little piece of paper, if either of us wants to just bounce out we can with no strings attached. After 9 years with her, if she asked me to get married right now, I'd pretty much tell her no.

Marriage and all the baggage it brings can kill relationships (I've seen it happen all to often), 2 people that were so in love they "tied-the-knot" and a year later are getting divorced. It's too expensive on both ends for my tastes.

krangs_androidbody · 04-03-2008, 02:15 PM

I agree with most of the posts here.

I would like to get married and have a nice wedding for my family and friends to celebrate but I'm in no rush. I'm at a point in life where my friends are starting to get married more frequently. One is already divorced. And that blows.

On a related note: If you plan on getting married to someone do you think living together beforehand is good, bad or irrelevant?

AnimalLover420 · 04-06-2008, 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krangs_androidbody

On a related note: If you plan on getting married to someone do you think living together beforehand is good, bad or irrelevant?

Personally, I think it's absolutely necessary to live with someone before being ready to marry them. I know religious freaks would oppose me on this, but it really makes more sense that way. How do you even know if a marriage would work if you don't even know whether or not you can live with that person? What if there was some deal-breaker that had yet to be revealed, such as the person being a total slob? I have lived with my man for about 4 years now, and I wouldn't have it any other way. We have our roles, each of us has different "chores" and such. Now if we do get married, we will already have all of that worked out. I just think it's the more logical thing to do.

badgoalie85 · 04-06-2008, 08:20 AM

too many people get married these days for financial reasons. too many people get married these days when they're way too young. you HAVE to live with someone before you marry them, and you have to get extremely comfortable with them. i think it's also important for everyone to learn to live alone first before they even consider marriage. it seems to me that it's only logical that someone should learn to truly love themselves before they try loving anyone else properly.

/2cents

toilet paper · 04-06-2008, 08:41 AM

unnecessary to a healthy happy relatoinship

kamikazi89 · 04-07-2008, 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bud Head

After seven years it's a legal bond any way. Even with out the paper certificate

i don't think this is true(common law marriage),,the reason i say this is because some old neighbors of mine thought so too, they were co habitaing for over 20 years they went to get some paperwork in order for something or another only to find out neither had rights(property, inheritance so on and so forth) unless it was specifically documented(deeds, wills) unlike the legal protections of marriage

..this was over 15 years ago, so things might have changed

03-06-2008, 02:39 PM	#1 (permalink)
Cerpin Taxt Who?? Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 4,651 Thanks: 1 Thanked 10 Times in 8 Posts	Thoughts on marriage? No particular reason, just had a discussion with a friend about the 50% divorce rate and on getting married. What are your thoughts? Me personally, I think that when people DO get married, it should be when they are at the point where they both know for a fact that any fight they get into isnt one that deals with the foundations of the relationship and would therefore be 'worth' breaking up over... A marriage should be a right of passage for couples who HAVE put in the effort to fix things that have inevitably come up and are simply compatable enough to do so. Idealist? __________________ "Some songs have a special meaning for a man, in regards to a special woman. But this can backfire. Because maybe the song had deeper meaning to begin with, but now its been cheapened. "We are the world, we are the children, we are the ones who make a better life, so lets keep on givin'..." You remember that song baby? The night I fucked you in the pet cemetary? That's our song!" -Mitch Hedberg

03-06-2008, 02:45 PM	#2 (permalink)
№1 Better than you. Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: out there Posts: 8,768 Thanks: 14 Thanked 57 Times in 46 Posts	Marriage is a chattel agreement to show ownership of another person, it has absolutely nothing to do with how one feels about another. Think about it, if you're committed to one person, why would you need a binding legal document to make sure one of them can't just leave, your heart should be the thing keeping you there not your lawyer. __________________ "No, improvising is wonderful. But, the thing is that you cannot improvise unless you know exactly what you're doing. " Christopher Walken --------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------- Hell

03-06-2008, 02:51 PM	#3 (permalink)
Flamingnun dot dot dot Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: roflmao Posts: 16,646 Thanks: 19 Thanked 198 Times in 103 Posts	Marriage is nothing outside of religion. I'm not religious, therefore i can manage relationships without some invisible contract. Edit: or some contract that entitles some ho' to half my estate. __________________ •10:38PM• <dennis_castro> bigger carbon footprint = bigger dick

03-06-2008, 09:50 PM	#6 (permalink)
BearsysRevenge Adminfiltrator Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: I've got BuffaLOVE Posts: 4,444 Thanks: 573 Thanked 139 Times in 100 Posts	My sentiments on marriage, to a T. __________________ Those who dance are considered insane by those who can't hear the music -George Carlin

03-07-2008, 10:02 AM	#7 (permalink)
Bud Head Yahooka admin Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 14,824 Thanks: 8 Thanked 51 Times in 37 Posts	After seven years it's a legal bond any way. Even with out the paper certificate __________________ If you want a drugfree country, then you must legalise. ~~BH~~

03-07-2008, 10:28 AM	#8 (permalink)
AnimalLover420 Love Junkie Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: US Posts: 3,199 Thanks: 3 Thanked 16 Times in 9 Posts	I think it's overrated. People get all starry-eyed at the thought of a wedding and end up marrying people they really don't want to be with for a lifetime. My man and I have been together for over 5 years now, and everyone is CONSTANTLY on our nuts about when we're going to tie the knot. But we're in no rush. Every married couple we talk to tells us to take our time and make absolutely sure we belong together before taking that final step. And what's funny is that we are pretty sure we want to stay together for as long as we're alive, but I still see no need for an elaborate (and costly) way of announcing to the world that we're together. Maybe someday we will, but for now we're happy living in sin. __________________ ************************************** R.I.P. Ken Gorman**

03-14-2008, 12:13 AM	#12 (permalink)
Micknjo YaHookan Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Australia Posts: 6 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post	me and my significant other just got married! spent our honeymoon blazed in the forrest, was great! dunno if that helps anyone, but i just wanted to say it

04-03-2008, 01:57 PM	#13 (permalink)
greenvibrance YaHookan Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 26 Thanks: 0 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts	getting married...well,I'll be happy if it happens and happy if doesn't....I'm cool with it....

04-03-2008, 02:04 PM	#14 (permalink)
Mental Remember Rule #33! Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Arizona Posts: 241 Thanks: 1 Thanked 8 Times in 8 Posts	I've been with my girl for 9yrs now? I proposed 2yrs into the relationship, and that was enough. I don't feel the need to be married. Some little piece of paper doesn't change who/what we are to each other. And without that little piece of paper, if either of us wants to just bounce out we can with no strings attached. After 9 years with her, if she asked me to get married right now, I'd pretty much tell her no. Marriage and all the baggage it brings can kill relationships (I've seen it happen all to often), 2 people that were so in love they "tied-the-knot" and a year later are getting divorced. It's too expensive on both ends for my tastes. __________________ In the land of the Normal, I choose to be me. In the land of the Confined, I choose to be free. In the land of the Oppressed, I choose to to enlightened. To those that understand I greet you hand to hand, for in this world, it is we few that choose to stand. Welcome to the new world, where the inmates are free, and the world isn't as it used to be. Welcome to the new life you will begin to live, free your mind and the rest will follow.

04-03-2008, 02:15 PM	#15 (permalink)
krangs_androidbody i said god damn Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 1,238 Thanks: 6 Thanked 15 Times in 13 Posts	I agree with most of the posts here. I would like to get married and have a nice wedding for my family and friends to celebrate but I'm in no rush. I'm at a point in life where my friends are starting to get married more frequently. One is already divorced. And that blows. On a related note: If you plan on getting married to someone do you think living together beforehand is good, bad or irrelevant? __________________ intoxication is an evolutionary force

04-06-2008, 08:20 AM	#17 (permalink)
badgoalie85 Chickenbutt. Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: the burbs of Fairfax, VA Posts: 428 Thanks: 14 Thanked 33 Times in 25 Posts	too many people get married these days for financial reasons. too many people get married these days when they're way too young. you HAVE to live with someone before you marry them, and you have to get extremely comfortable with them. i think it's also important for everyone to learn to live alone first before they even consider marriage. it seems to me that it's only logical that someone should learn to truly love themselves before they try loving anyone else properly. /2cents __________________ Pursue happiness.

04-06-2008, 08:41 AM	#18 (permalink)
toilet paper on the pot Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: salle de bains Posts: 65 Thanks: 170 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts	unnecessary to a healthy happy relatoinship