~Futile~ - Page 3

Jake_Armstrong · 08-18-2007, 10:07 PM

do you know the song "Gallileo" by the Indigo Girls? If not you should give it a listen.

**Pharm Girl** · 08-21-2007, 05:03 PM

Through the distorted lies, shall shine the eyes of truth!
These eyes see which they can't or won't!
All your hate and corruption sickens me.
Why can't they comprehend?
They write what they see, not what they know!
They await the blood.
My blood or of the liar and corruptor?
Will my blood make things right?
I have waited far too long.

**Pharm Girl** · 08-21-2007, 06:12 PM

I have never been really loved before
I wouldn't know what to expect
Im so scared to let myself fall......
Will it have a reverse effect?

You tell me what love is!

Some tell me to let go,
They say I should take a chance......
But who will catch me if I fall?

In spite of all that's happened
I choose not to choose!
I'll just run and hide......

My buddy was always by my side
I dont understand it, now he's resting eternally.
And I sit and cry.........
What is the reasoning for this and that?
Please tell me why......

**Pharm Girl** · 08-21-2007, 07:44 PM

I’m confused and just a bit frustrated!
Being loved and in a heartbeat hated.

Was there not enough lies?
Was I not sophisticated enough?
Enough disguises!
You are not a big enough prize!

As I stand here with all my faults……

What made me think I was so special?
That you could love me for me!

It's stupid, irrelevant, shameful and so arrogant

I’m no longer your victim, it can't be!
I'm free of you.

It's easy to ignore me, to ignore the thing you fear
and hold dear.

It's easy to reject me……
I don’t need you to protect me!
I can handle the pain.

For no one, not even you, will I hide……
You know what you need?
A woman like me, to do the deed.

You lied to me
You stole from me
That makes you insane!

I’m not confused anymore, just a little bit tired.

**Pharm Girl** · 09-10-2007, 06:44 PM

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for.
It doesn't interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It does interest me to know which planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself.

I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from it’s mere presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine.

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done.

It doesn't interest me to know or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Shaggy_420 · 09-10-2007, 07:36 PM

marijuana

**Pharm Girl** · 09-12-2007, 03:49 AM

**Pharm Girl** · 09-12-2007, 09:04 PM

I can live with failure, yours and mine.

I have touched the centre of my own sorrow.

I have stood in the centre of the fire .

I have risked looking like a fool for love, for a dream, for the adventure of being alive........

I have been alone with myself and if you truly like my company, you will keep me in your thoughts~.

Nerevar_4 · 10-05-2007, 05:17 PM

There good. You've got skill. It almost seems like you were sad or a little pissed off when you wrote most of them, but I like em'.

**Pharm Girl** · 10-05-2007, 05:54 PM

Sad, confused and and betrayed pretty well sums up the idea behind "Futile".

Center · 10-05-2007, 06:33 PM

Great stuff!

I LOVE poetry...mabye hip hop a little more but it's still poetry.

Love!

**Pharm Girl** · 10-06-2007, 03:33 AM

Thank-You kindly!

Poem number 11 is on my plate these days!

Mental · 10-07-2007, 12:35 PM

PG I like the ones you've posted so far. Definitely feeling post #45. And with your permission, I'd love to try and do a counter to it, from the other side of that invisible wall we all strive to break down, but never really try to get around. Keep them up though, you've got an amazing way with imagery.

**Pharm Girl** · 10-07-2007, 03:02 PM

Please be my guest, Mental.

**Pharm Girl** · 10-07-2007, 03:27 PM

As painful as the memories were
they came in waves that wouldn’t end.
And always left my heart feeling torn apart,
unable to amend.

Promises made that time wouldn’t heal
the damage done inside.
A trail of memories from so long ago
should have just turned to dust and died.

For him, it seems like the magic worked,
the flames grew every higher.
I blocked his incandescent spell,
and in time he became a liar.

Must we always try
to cover up the past?
I sail in dangerous open seas
that rock my very being.

My compass always points emotionally
toward a very distant memory
My common sense refuses it
I’ve been there, done that!.

The hands of time can not be reversed.
Yet the blood still drips still from my wounded heart.
Yes, you are a liar.

Something to be very proud of!

Mental · 10-08-2007, 11:22 PM

Ok, so this is my attempt to "answer" #45. Enjoy?

Ever Higher

I see the pain etched on your face
I see the questions you're asking, about my place
I've ridden the fire
As it danced ever higher and higher
I've wore the wounds
As I attempted to hang the moon
I hear the questions you continue to ask
Into the deep dark depths of my shattered past
I know you want to discover
Can I be your one and only, true lover
Am I able to withstand
And someday become "your man"
The words wash over me
These ever asked questions cause me to see
Can I truly be, me?
Can I truly finally, see?
Can we truly be, free?
You ask so much
It's almost as if, I'm to be the crutch
As this world turns
Can our love still burn?
The only way to know
Is the only way to show
So, spark the fire
And lets take this as it ever climbs higher...

**Pharm Girl** · 10-09-2007, 12:23 AM

Holy Suckatash........... ...do another Mental.

Talent here is unreal.

**Pharm Girl** · 10-09-2007, 06:30 PM

I wish I could tell you
the secret thoughts in my head.
I wish I could show you
what I can do with with my green thumb.
That’s only if if u get to know the real me
That’s if you’re right for me..
I know I could Love You……
I have for a long, long time wondered!.

My feelings must never get out.
I should have met you sooner.
I feel sometimes that u feel the same way too
We could be so right for each other.
Nanny used to tell me one day I’d find someone
A soul mate? I ask how will I know?
She only said I’d just know..
I wish to find myself there...
and I then I would know what Nanny said had come true.
I’ve known all my life,
That I need something that may not even exist.
I wish i had met you sooner.
Was it written in the stars?
Are were made for each other?.
I know and you know
It’s all but a colorful dream.

**Pharm Girl** · 10-19-2007, 06:16 PM

Paint me a rainbow and color it red,
Bring me a dream to spin with golden thread.
Sing to me a song that puts a smile on my face.
And when you're drifting through my mind.........stay in there awhile.

When you leave, slowly back away from me,
Tell me once more, what or who you're leaving for.

Plant me a pink rose to grow outside my window
Make the moon shine and the stars twinkle.
Whisper one last time to me the words that makes my eyes sparkle.

Come with me and dance one last time!

**Pharm Girl** · 10-23-2007, 05:53 PM

By nature solitary and monkish, pot fits me like a priest's hood. Pot is for thinkers. Pot makes you think. Pot makes you more aware and intelligent. Pot is not like hard booze, which obliterates your brain with sleep. It makes your mind buzz without sleeping, you stay awake and dream, daydream.
Your mood determines what you will think on pot, as well as in your daily prosaic life. So, if you have problems, pot will make you think about those problems. People call thinking about your problems worry. This may be unpleasant. Worry is unpleasant. People don't like to be worried and so don't like to smoke pot and worry. This is called a bad trip.

Thinking is seeing, too, and not just the internal mind process but the external view around you. Sensitivity it's called when you suddenly see a dew drop on the knobby bud of a pear tree. That's awareness. That's a higher consciousness. Higher consciousness is when you suddenly see the pattern of behavior in a person's acts, including your own. Higher consciousness is seeing the meaning in a poem. Or suddenly feeling great love for everything and everyone around you. A burst of spontaneous joy that makes waves of love roll over you. The world is beautiful. The small things count. You can understand that a grass strand is worthy and meaningful in itself.

08-21-2007, 05:03 PM	#42 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	Through the distorted lies, shall shine the eyes of truth! These eyes see which they can't or won't! All your hate and corruption sickens me. Why can't they comprehend? They write what they see, not what they know! They await the blood. My blood or of the liar and corruptor? Will my blood make things right? I have waited far too long. Last edited by Pharm Girl; 08-21-2007 at 06:14 PM.

09-10-2007, 07:36 PM	#46 (permalink)
Shaggy_420 Marijuana Consumer Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: FL Posts: 756 Thanks: 203 Thanked 62 Times in 30 Posts	marijuana __________________ "Penalties against the possession of a drug should not be more damaging to an individual than the use of the drug itself... Nowhere is this more clear to me than in the laws against possession of marijuana... Therefore, I support legislation amending federal law to eliminate all federal criminal penalties for the possession of up to 1 oz. of marijuana." - Jimmy Carter, Former President & Nobel Peace Prize Winner "When you smoke the herb it reveals you to yourself" - Bob Marley

09-12-2007, 03:49 AM	#47 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	bump

10-05-2007, 05:17 PM	#49 (permalink)
Nerevar_4 YaHookan Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Missouri Posts: 92 Thanks: 1 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	There good. You've got skill. It almost seems like you were sad or a little pissed off when you wrote most of them, but I like em'. __________________

10-07-2007, 12:35 PM	#53 (permalink)
Mental Remember Rule #33! Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Arizona Posts: 241 Thanks: 1 Thanked 8 Times in 8 Posts	PG I like the ones you've posted so far. Definitely feeling post #45. And with your permission, I'd love to try and do a counter to it, from the other side of that invisible wall we all strive to break down, but never really try to get around. Keep them up though, you've got an amazing way with imagery. __________________ In the land of the Normal, I choose to be me. In the land of the Confined, I choose to be free. In the land of the Oppressed, I choose to to enlightened. To those that understand I greet you hand to hand, for in this world, it is we few that choose to stand. Welcome to the new world, where the inmates are free, and the world isn't as it used to be. Welcome to the new life you will begin to live, free your mind and the rest will follow.

08-18-2007, 10:07 PM	#41 (permalink)
Jake_Armstrong YaHookan Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: elsewhere Posts: 1,186 Thanks: 0 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts	do you know the song "Gallileo" by the Indigo Girls? If not you should give it a listen.

08-21-2007, 06:12 PM	#43 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	I have never been really loved before I wouldn't know what to expect Im so scared to let myself fall...... Will it have a reverse effect? You tell me what love is! Some tell me to let go, They say I should take a chance...... But who will catch me if I fall? In spite of all that's happened I choose not to choose! I'll just run and hide...... My buddy was always by my side I dont understand it, now he's resting eternally. And I sit and cry......... What is the reasoning for this and that? Please tell me why......

08-21-2007, 07:44 PM	#44 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	I’m confused and just a bit frustrated! Being loved and in a heartbeat hated. Was there not enough lies? Was I not sophisticated enough? Enough disguises! You are not a big enough prize! As I stand here with all my faults…… What made me think I was so special? That you could love me for me! It's stupid, irrelevant, shameful and so arrogant I’m no longer your victim, it can't be! I'm free of you. It's easy to ignore me, to ignore the thing you fear and hold dear. It's easy to reject me…… I don’t need you to protect me! I can handle the pain. For no one, not even you, will I hide…… You know what you need? A woman like me, to do the deed. You lied to me You stole from me That makes you insane! I’m not confused anymore, just a little bit tired.

09-10-2007, 06:44 PM	#45 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for. It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive. It does interest me to know which planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from it’s mere presence. I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine. It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done. It doesn't interest me to know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me. It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away. I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

09-12-2007, 09:04 PM	#48 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	I can live with failure, yours and mine. I have touched the centre of my own sorrow. I have stood in the centre of the fire . I have risked looking like a fool for love, for a dream, for the adventure of being alive........ I have been alone with myself and if you truly like my company, you will keep me in your thoughts~.

10-05-2007, 05:54 PM	#50 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	Sad, confused and and betrayed pretty well sums up the idea behind "Futile".

10-05-2007, 06:33 PM	#51 (permalink)
Center YaHookan Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: on my way up the ladder of greatness Posts: 525 Thanks: 5 Thanked 33 Times in 26 Posts	Great stuff! I LOVE poetry...mabye hip hop a little more but it's still poetry. Love!

10-06-2007, 03:33 AM	#52 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	Thank-You kindly! Poem number 11 is on my plate these days!

10-07-2007, 03:02 PM	#54 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	Please be my guest, Mental.

10-07-2007, 03:27 PM	#55 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	As painful as the memories were they came in waves that wouldn’t end. And always left my heart feeling torn apart, unable to amend. Promises made that time wouldn’t heal the damage done inside. A trail of memories from so long ago should have just turned to dust and died. For him, it seems like the magic worked, the flames grew every higher. I blocked his incandescent spell, and in time he became a liar. Must we always try to cover up the past? I sail in dangerous open seas that rock my very being. My compass always points emotionally toward a very distant memory My common sense refuses it I’ve been there, done that!. The hands of time can not be reversed. Yet the blood still drips still from my wounded heart. Yes, you are a liar. Something to be very proud of!

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10-08-2007, 11:22 PM	#56 (permalink)
Mental Remember Rule #33! Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Arizona Posts: 241 Thanks: 1 Thanked 8 Times in 8 Posts	Ever Higher Ok, so this is my attempt to "answer" #45. Enjoy? Ever Higher I see the pain etched on your face I see the questions you're asking, about my place I've ridden the fire As it danced ever higher and higher I've wore the wounds As I attempted to hang the moon I hear the questions you continue to ask Into the deep dark depths of my shattered past I know you want to discover Can I be your one and only, true lover Am I able to withstand And someday become "your man" The words wash over me These ever asked questions cause me to see Can I truly be, me? Can I truly finally, see? Can we truly be, free? You ask so much It's almost as if, I'm to be the crutch As this world turns Can our love still burn? The only way to know Is the only way to show So, spark the fire And lets take this as it ever climbs higher... __________________ In the land of the Normal, I choose to be me. In the land of the Confined, I choose to be free. In the land of the Oppressed, I choose to to enlightened. To those that understand I greet you hand to hand, for in this world, it is we few that choose to stand. Welcome to the new world, where the inmates are free, and the world isn't as it used to be. Welcome to the new life you will begin to live, free your mind and the rest will follow.

10-09-2007, 12:23 AM	#57 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	Holy Suckatash........... ...do another Mental. Talent here is unreal.

10-09-2007, 06:30 PM	#58 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	Wishes...........~ I wish I could tell you the secret thoughts in my head. I wish I could show you what I can do with with my green thumb. That’s only if if u get to know the real me That’s if you’re right for me.. I know I could Love You…… I have for a long, long time wondered!. My feelings must never get out. I should have met you sooner. I feel sometimes that u feel the same way too We could be so right for each other. Nanny used to tell me one day I’d find someone A soul mate? I ask how will I know? She only said I’d just know.. I wish to find myself there... and I then I would know what Nanny said had come true. I’ve known all my life, That I need something that may not even exist. I wish i had met you sooner. Was it written in the stars? Are were made for each other?. I know and you know It’s all but a colorful dream.

10-19-2007, 06:16 PM	#59 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	Paint me a rainbow and color it red, Bring me a dream to spin with golden thread. Sing to me a song that puts a smile on my face. And when you're drifting through my mind.........stay in there awhile. When you leave, slowly back away from me, Tell me once more, what or who you're leaving for. Plant me a pink rose to grow outside my window Make the moon shine and the stars twinkle. Whisper one last time to me the words that makes my eyes sparkle. Come with me and dance one last time!

10-23-2007, 05:53 PM	#60 (permalink)
Pharm Girl ??? Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 2,188 Thanks: 116 Thanked 107 Times in 89 Posts	By nature solitary and monkish, pot fits me like a priest's hood. Pot is for thinkers. Pot makes you think. Pot makes you more aware and intelligent. Pot is not like hard booze, which obliterates your brain with sleep. It makes your mind buzz without sleeping, you stay awake and dream, daydream. Your mood determines what you will think on pot, as well as in your daily prosaic life. So, if you have problems, pot will make you think about those problems. People call thinking about your problems worry. This may be unpleasant. Worry is unpleasant. People don't like to be worried and so don't like to smoke pot and worry. This is called a bad trip. Thinking is seeing, too, and not just the internal mind process but the external view around you. Sensitivity it's called when you suddenly see a dew drop on the knobby bud of a pear tree. That's awareness. That's a higher consciousness. Higher consciousness is when you suddenly see the pattern of behavior in a person's acts, including your own. Higher consciousness is seeing the meaning in a poem. Or suddenly feeling great love for everything and everyone around you. A burst of spontaneous joy that makes waves of love roll over you. The world is beautiful. The small things count. You can understand that a grass strand is worthy and meaningful in itself.