Who invented the blowjob?

The Rev · 11-04-2009, 04:46 PM

This question crossed my mind a few days ago, and I'm still not sure. I can imagine three scenarios.

In the first one, it's invented by a guy. I mean, of course only a guy would think up such a thing.

Then again, I can see some enterprising young woman, perhaps intent upon becoming betrothed to one of the wealthier men in her village, tribe, whatever, thinking, "I know how I can win this shit, easy!"

Then again again, it could have been a gay dude that invented it. This is entirely possible. One guy thinks, "Man, I wish I could get this thing in my mouth.. Hey, I've got an idea!!" Then he finds another dude and gets him to agree to "do me if I do you."

What do you think, YaHooka?

The Rev

Mercury · 11-04-2009, 04:49 PM

I think we've come to the conclusion that it was the fruit bats.

Geeno · 11-04-2009, 04:51 PM

its human nature to poke females with your weiner.

whenever I have one available im usually pokin that thing all over the place, It just happens.

~1~ · 11-04-2009, 04:54 PM

The bj was invented long before 'gay' was so you can rule that guy out...

Hedons · 11-04-2009, 04:56 PM

Arthur Blow (1023-1079) was an army leader in the Battle Of Hastings. The troops' morale was often low so he devised a cunning method of keeping spirits up by instructing his wife to orally service them as they waited in line. The troops, being grateful for such stress relief, referred to her daily doings as a Blow Job in honour of their leader.

toastyroach · 11-04-2009, 04:56 PM

in order to create the blowjob from scratch... you must first invent the universe

osirus2020 · 11-04-2009, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mercury

I think we've come to the conclusion that it was the fruit bats.

Wikipedia even agrees.

Waves · 11-04-2009, 05:27 PM

^gays didnt invent blowjobs!

Cerpin Taxt · 11-04-2009, 05:35 PM

Sure makes history a hell of a lot more interesting

EDIT: Damn, can't link pics... but it's hilarious seeing some of these vintage paintings showing goils going to town

Bearsy · 11-04-2009, 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by toastyroach

in order to create the blowjob from scratch... you must first invent the universe

LHM · 11-04-2009, 06:30 PM

The blowjob was invented by a man named Siphilus Quagmire. A wealthy man about town, well known. One day while relieving tension in the tea room, he realised he had run short of personal lubricant. He searched his old english mansion top to bottom for something to suffice, curiously finding himself in the kitchen. He noticed a pan of old dripping from the roast the night before. So he sat down on the ole' cooks chair, closed his eyes and proceeded to indulge in a bout of handy pandy. Unaccustomed to the new sensation the dripping had brought, he had not realised the house terrier had strolled in and started sampling the dripping off of his phalic membrane. At first he felt shocked, low, and perverted, but as he halted his initial judgement, he glanced around the kitchen, and let himself slide into and unprecedented amount of gratification.

As the terrier strolled away, satisfied with his salty high fat high protein meal, Siphilus had realised a revolution was about to take place in the sexual realm, a new idea brought to bedrooms and alleyways all over the world, and that night he made the propasal to his wife - Mary Eden. Naturally the bitch ran her mouth and in no time chicks were suckin dick left right and centre. It changed the whole fabric of society.

The SARS Volta · 11-04-2009, 07:01 PM

don't you know greek people invented everything? the ancient greeks surely. meaning indeed also a gay man.

crookedhatinator45 · 11-04-2009, 07:26 PM

either greek dudes in the barracks or a white chick somewhere.

ColtEtish · 11-04-2009, 11:42 PM

If it was a woman it was definitely a white chick. I have yet to have a girl who isn't Caucasian give me a decent blow job.

But then again I have never been with anyone who wasn't at least 75% white. And she might have just had a good tan...

José · 11-04-2009, 11:48 PM

I've had a girlfriend where I was almost to the point of wtf, this girl really wants to suck my dick? some girls just love to do it, and guys can't resist. it's a win-win situation.

ColtEtish · 11-04-2009, 11:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpankyMcLankey

I've had a girlfriend where I was almost to the point of wtf, this girl really wants to suck my dick? some girls just love to do it, and guys can't resist. it's a win-win situation.

I'm like the guy version of that chick. I LOVE eating pussy. Many a man has thought me crazy for going down on a woman, but I think they're crazy for not. Eating va-jay-jay is the tits

cantSEEme · 11-05-2009, 12:10 AM

who invented the blowjob?

who cares.

just suck my dick, bitch. i want to see the droolcum land on your chest.

open mouth, moneyshot, win.

al-Mu'akhkhir · 11-05-2009, 01:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ColtEtish

I'm like the guy version of that chick. I LOVE eating pussy. Many a man has thought me crazy for going down on a woman, but I think they're crazy for not. Eating va-jay-jay is the tits

Cerebro · 11-05-2009, 02:00 AM

it was a straight guy, who then became gay

Mikey · 11-05-2009, 09:44 AM

im suprised no yahookan has taken credit for it yet

View Poll Results: Who Invented the Blowjob?
A straight guy	3	15.00%
A straight girl	8	40.00%
A gay guy	9	45.00%
Voters: 20. You may not vote on this poll

11-04-2009, 04:46 PM	#1 (permalink)
The Rev Clear Light Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: In my head, somewhere. Posts: 17,860 Thanks: 5,012 Thanked 5,416 Times in 2,862 Posts	Who invented the blowjob? This question crossed my mind a few days ago, and I'm still not sure. I can imagine three scenarios. In the first one, it's invented by a guy. I mean, of course only a guy would think up such a thing. Then again, I can see some enterprising young woman, perhaps intent upon becoming betrothed to one of the wealthier men in her village, tribe, whatever, thinking, "I know how I can win this shit, easy!" Then again again, it could have been a gay dude that invented it. This is entirely possible. One guy thinks, "Man, I wish I could get this thing in my mouth.. Hey, I've got an idea!!" Then he finds another dude and gets him to agree to "do me if I do you." What do you think, YaHooka? The Rev __________________ Budforce - My Friend August 29, 1973- May 25, 2012

11-04-2009, 04:54 PM	#4 (permalink)
~1~ Successful Failure Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: where 'they' can't see. Posts: 10,925 Thanks: 466 Thanked 1,581 Times in 925 Posts	The bj was invented long before 'gay' was so you can rule that guy out... __________________ "And those who are successful, be always on your guard. Success walks hand in hand with failure, along Hollywood Boulevard" Ray Davies --------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------- Click Here Asshole

11-04-2009, 04:56 PM	#5 (permalink)
Hedons Ribbed for her pleasure! Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Chicago Burbs. Delta(x) times Delta(p) is greater than or equal to h-bar over two. Posts: 4,645 Thanks: 23 Thanked 189 Times in 101 Posts	Arthur Blow (1023-1079) was an army leader in the Battle Of Hastings. The troops' morale was often low so he devised a cunning method of keeping spirits up by instructing his wife to orally service them as they waited in line. The troops, being grateful for such stress relief, referred to her daily doings as a Blow Job in honour of their leader. __________________ New and improved! Now with flushable applicator.

11-04-2009, 04:56 PM	#6 (permalink)
toastyroach clan stark Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: the unmanifested Posts: 3,790 Thanks: 288 Thanked 405 Times in 238 Posts	in order to create the blowjob from scratch... you must first invent the universe __________________ "I'm gonna pray for deadhead as well even though I'm not religious, just super committed to trolling." Terry

11-04-2009, 04:49 PM	#2 (permalink)
Mercury Special Delivery Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: The States Posts: 8,150 Thanks: 294 Thanked 801 Times in 539 Posts	I think we've come to the conclusion that it was the fruit bats.

11-04-2009, 05:27 PM	#8 (permalink)
Waves Duderino Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: chiburbs Posts: 15,405 Thanks: 991 Thanked 4,036 Times in 2,224 Posts	^gays didnt invent blowjobs! __________________ On this life that we call home The years go fast and the days go so slow Last edited by Waves; 11-04-2009 at 05:29 PM.

11-04-2009, 05:35 PM	#9 (permalink)
Cerpin Taxt Yahookan Zealot Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 7,213 Blog Entries: 1 Thanks: 843 Thanked 1,919 Times in 1,011 Posts	Sure makes history a hell of a lot more interesting EDIT: Damn, can't link pics... but it's hilarious seeing some of these vintage paintings showing goils going to town __________________ Step Back. Evaluate. Recognize. "All memory is really a form of regurgitation of undigested experience." -Alan Watts Last edited by Cerpin Taxt; 11-04-2009 at 05:37 PM.

11-04-2009, 06:30 PM	#11 (permalink)
LHM BRINGBACKFANCYSYMBOL Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 599 Thanks: 70 Thanked 85 Times in 28 Posts	The blowjob was invented by a man named Siphilus Quagmire. A wealthy man about town, well known. One day while relieving tension in the tea room, he realised he had run short of personal lubricant. He searched his old english mansion top to bottom for something to suffice, curiously finding himself in the kitchen. He noticed a pan of old dripping from the roast the night before. So he sat down on the ole' cooks chair, closed his eyes and proceeded to indulge in a bout of handy pandy. Unaccustomed to the new sensation the dripping had brought, he had not realised the house terrier had strolled in and started sampling the dripping off of his phalic membrane. At first he felt shocked, low, and perverted, but as he halted his initial judgement, he glanced around the kitchen, and let himself slide into and unprecedented amount of gratification. As the terrier strolled away, satisfied with his salty high fat high protein meal, Siphilus had realised a revolution was about to take place in the sexual realm, a new idea brought to bedrooms and alleyways all over the world, and that night he made the propasal to his wife - Mary Eden. Naturally the bitch ran her mouth and in no time chicks were suckin dick left right and centre. It changed the whole fabric of society. __________________ Next time you say "I have nothing in common with this person," remember that you have a great deal in common: A few years from now - two years or seventy years, it doesn't make much difference - both of you will have become rotting corpses, then piles of dust, then nothing at all.

11-04-2009, 11:48 PM	#15 (permalink)
José YaHookan Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 3,363 Thanks: 62 Thanked 147 Times in 72 Posts	I've had a girlfriend where I was almost to the point of wtf, this girl really wants to suck my dick? some girls just love to do it, and guys can't resist. it's a win-win situation.

11-05-2009, 12:10 AM	#17 (permalink)
cantSEEme Cold School Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 3,019 Thanks: 152 Thanked 127 Times in 457 Posts	who invented the blowjob? who cares. just suck my dick, bitch. i want to see the droolcum land on your chest. open mouth, moneyshot, win. __________________

11-05-2009, 09:44 AM	#20 (permalink)
Mikey Seasoned YaHookan Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: gulf islands bc Posts: 7,442 Thanks: 1,144 Thanked 2,246 Times in 1,475 Posts	im suprised no yahookan has taken credit for it yet __________________ RIP Gov

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