Jewish Pork

A few days ago, me and my homies went out to eat. We decided on this on this upper class joint under the assumption that we should expect a good meal and good service; but these expectations must have been too much.

To start this horrible experience, we were greeted by this absolutely filthy looking white man. I mean this guy looked like death had warmed over. He was the illustration of neglect for personal hygiene (pungent body odor, dirty finger nails, and breath you could smell from a distance).

Trust me, me and my friends aren't huge restaurant critics or anything; and we probably could have just ignored this guy's filth (dipping our silverware in boiling water or just resorting to plastic forks)... However, this man had a terrible personality and attitude. Frankly, I think he was racist. We received off putting/demeaning looks the entire time we were sitting at the table. This really just ruined the meal for us.

To make a long story short, we left the asshole a 5% tip (hoping he'd buy some soap and tooth paste); and we'll never be eating there again.

deadhead94

there isnt many parody threads here

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Roach

fail.

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לזיין את הקופים

Grieves

why tip at all...

use the 3 strike principle...

20% if everything is perfect
-10% if waiter is rude, service is slow, etc...
-10% if the food is terrible, service is terrible, waiter is ungroomed, etc...

all you are doing by leaving 5% is conditioning him to think that that type of presentation is acceptable...

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Sir-Ex

When I have a shitty waiter/waitress I leave exact change + two pennies.

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

~1~

Exactly, it should be up to the owner of the restaurant to pay their employees enough to want to come to work and then they can pass that on to me in great, sincere service instead of mediocre service in hopes of pittance from the guy who already paid to eat there.

I don't tip the guys at In-N-Out even though I get fucking great service and a product I go out of my way for, I don't have to, day one starts @ $10 an hour to take out the trash. He knows what is buttering his bread and knows why so he makes sure to keep it going.


But I digress...

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Roach

20 % if everything is perfect, without fail.

If the food is terrible I'll let the manager/cook/chef know it's not worth paying for at all.

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לזיין את הקופים

Grieves

I have often asked to see the cook and tipped them directly if the service was terrible but the food was good...I want those responsible to be rewarded for their excellent service and those not responsible to understand exactly why i did not tip...

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Man in Black

I tip pretty generously if I can afford it and it is deserved. especially agree with what Grieves said about tipping the cooks because that happened to me many times when I worked at a restaurant because even though I might not have been as fast as the other cooks I took time to make it good and they knew this and would actually request me to make their food for them. servers would too.

my theory was always simple. just use the golden rule man, make someone else's food the same way you'd make your own.

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When I was arrested I was dressed in black.

Roach

so you've worked in a kitchen too.

I did in my sophomore year in hs.

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לזיין את הקופים

deadhead94

That is 2 strikes and a set of starting conditions.

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clive

im that guy who always lets people know if something isn't right with the service

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Sir-Ex

Everyone has to work in a kitchen at least once.

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

ionlylooklazy

ive never worked in a kitchen

Man in Black

elitist

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When I was arrested I was dressed in black.

Marley$herb

where is the social uproar? I tried to legit get some answers from some black ppl because I honestly want to know wht they do those things. and much like the woman all the black ppl that used to post here now dont. so I got a 6 page long thread full of uptight white ppl screaming racist. so if there is a black person on this entire website heres your.chance now on this day of 11_11_11 to do whats right and stick up for whitey. the white man. white reagen<blackjesus

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i sway the tec wit the Tech and Sway Step away, wet and spray, rep the day Who over debt to pay get swept away Across the whole board like checker play When I blaze your whole sect' arrays Wake Up Show for those who slept away Niggas that met the trey, hit the deck and pray DJ Revolution, spinnin like lead from out the head decay Tearin your neck away, flood up the street wit blood redecorate Until the head of jake investigate

Dr. Nick Nasty

this sucks. it hurts my eyes.

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Waves

holy.shit.

lol.

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On this life that we call home
The years go fast and the days go so slow

Roach

and you still haven't caught on ?

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לזיין את הקופים

Marley$herb

silly dough fuckers

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i sway the tec wit the Tech and Sway Step away, wet and spray, rep the day Who over debt to pay get swept away Across the whole board like checker play When I blaze your whole sect' arrays Wake Up Show for those who slept away Niggas that met the trey, hit the deck and pray DJ Revolution, spinnin like lead from out the head decay Tearin your neck away, flood up the street wit blood redecorate Until the head of jake investigate