kitch

I stole this from reddit user Freebass and I'm not waves so I'll admit it.

So check this out. We had what we thought was a "serial shitter" in Iraq. Every day, one of our stalls in our bathroom trailer would end up with the toilet, floor, and the lower part of the stall spattered with foul liquid shit. We didn't have janitors at this location so we all had to rotate the janitorial responsibilities and all of us ended up cleaning this shit at some point. It got so bad that it was now mentioned in the morning briefings and all of us were looking to give this person a proper beatdown. So one afternoon, I head to the bathroom trailer to take a shower and at first glance it appears I'm alone. I get the water warming up and start to strip down when I heard what sounds like someone banging on the inside of the stall and then this horrible splatter on the floor. I got down on my hands and knees to look for feet, but see none! So I make my way down the line of stalls trying to peek inside and sure enough, I see one of our Iraqi employees trying to stand on the toilet seat with his dish-dash (man dress) hiked up around his waist. Shit is everywhere. On the toilet, the wall, the floor, his feet. So I bang on the door and ask him WTF and he just said, "Please, please, one minute, one minute." So I stand back and notice that now a lot of water mixed with shit is flowing out of the stall and down the length of the bathroom to the floor drain. Shortly thereafter, the door opens and he says, "My friend. How do you do it?" I was like, do what? He says, "Make the shit. When I stand on the plastic, it moves left and right and the shit goes everywhere! When I stand on the glass (porcelain rim) it is too thin and my feet slip into the water!" I told him, look man, you put the plastic down and sit on it to make the shit. To which he replied, "I will never put my ass where another man's ass has been. It's nasty!" I was like, dude, this shit is most definitely nasty! Here's the thing, this guy was from a decent size city in Iraq, but had never used what some of them call a "West" toilet. Theirs aren't simply holes in the ground. They have a water tank like ours, only it's mounted on the wall up above your head. There are two equidistant foot "slots" where you try to wedge your feet, then you squat over the hole, do your business, and flush. Then (they don't traditionally use toilet paper), you use a little sprayer that's mounted on the wall and you wash any remains outta the crack of your ass or anywhere else you might have gotten some. Some places don't have sprayers, but have a faucet with a bucket of water. You use your hand as toilet paper and flush repeatedly with the bucket of water until shitty hands and ass are clean. I personally could never quite get it right (shit all over my lower half quite a few times) so eventually I just started stripping down from the waist down and then took a full shower afterwards every time I needed to take a dump. This sounds like what the Asian guy might be going thru. Sidenote: Every time I met a new group of Iraqis and we'd be making small talk, I'd say, "I really love the water fountains in all the bathrooms over here! They're great! You can use the bathroom and have a drink at the same time!" The look on their face every time? Horrifically priceless!

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Lloydy

Bondi will be along in a minute to explain how wiping your arse with your hand is a better method than bog roll

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Keep the red flag flying high

kamikazi89

i was stationed with a guy who used to shit in the shower every morning. he was from arkansas..that's all i got

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katie west is the best

adventure

Where did it go? Kamikazi? what the fuck?

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Coming Full Range

Sir-Ex

Wiping with (water + hand) > (toilet paper) in every respect other than the contrived gross out factor.


It's cheaper, less resource intensive, easier on the water system & plumbing, more thoroughly cleaning, and softer on the sphincter.



That said, I use toilet paper, but only because I'm a contrived little bitch.

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

Snowmayne

ah yes.. the hole in the ground toilet. the toilet that you have to pay to use at almost any stop when traveling through Turkey in these parts.

my daughters fucking terrified of them.

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We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.
We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated.
Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: "How amazing am I ?! "

Dhomnley

I think they could invent something that would involve a glass device and a separate sink for rinsing/washing. Slightly more water consumption, but it wouldn't be any less sanitary. You would need the extra sink though, maybe that could be attached to the toilet...

Sir-Ex

You're talking about in North America right?


I shudder to think of what the 1st decade of that would look like while we made the switch.

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

adventure

Snowmayne yeah I could see a child terrified by a huge seemingly bottomless hole full of shit.

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Coming Full Range

adventure

So I wanted to find some facts about toilet paper.... in the 3-5 websites I have read through I have seen one statistics... X% of The United States solid waste is from paper. That X has been 35%, 52% and 64%. I found the same variance is the statistic...
X is the amount of paper made from recycled paper, any where from 25% to 77%

and I also found this interesting.... The United States produces 70% of the world's solid waste.
have a good day

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Coming Full Range

Lloydy

Negative. Shit on the hands = bad.

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Sir-Ex

There's a 100% chance you have shit on your hands right now.

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

Dhomnley

Think about a "sub sink" that slides out from under the toilet with the glass device in it. It would be shaped to pick up shit or even have a suction effect. Rinse it off, repeat. The water from sub sink would go in toilet.

I bet whoever invented the toilet was laughed at when he proposed his idea.

Sir-Ex

Sure it could work at home, but I was thinking in the context of public washrooms.

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

Dhomnley

We would still use tp for public bathrooms. Come on, man!

Lloydy

But nowhere near as much shit as a guy who used his hands to clean his arse

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Keep the red flag flying high

Sir-Ex

Sure, yeah. What are we talking about here? If you want a toilet sink go for it. Personally if I ever decided to stop using TP I'd just shower after every shit, kill two birds with one stone, or just get my fuck slave to lick it up for me and pinch that bitches cheek 'choo little slut now throw it up in the garbage bitch'

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

Sir-Ex

I reckon the amount of shit would be comparable considering you're both washing your hands after (I assume).

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Smile

Ditch the cigs!!!!!!

my_scatterheart

omg I'm terrified for her.

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Be mindful even if your mind is full. -J. De La Vega

deadhead94

I only wash my hands when I shit on them.

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