wnfakind

So I dont know where to post this, and I really need some advice..

I was in a relationship for 4 years.. I loved this girl since the first time I saw her, we fell in love pretty hard and deep. We shared the same care it was extremely coodependancy.. We had been through the worst and also had the best.. Around the 3rd year of the relationship we started to get into alot of stupid drug's together.. Not the good ones.. Coke, extacy, ketamine.. She has an extremely addictive personality when it comes to these substances.. and now I absouletly regret having those thing's involved in a relationship and I know im a complete dumbass but I didnt see this coming.

Within the last month of the relationship we were still "inlove" But just about 2 hours ago, we were talking on the phone.. first time we acutally talked on the phone for an hour and this is now 9 months after the relation has been over.. She is still hitting the drug's pretty hard and relies on them to enjoy herself and to feel that everything is alright..

What get's me is I thought maybe all the coke was what changed her feeling's about me but she openly admitted it was the ketamine.. we only did about 5 grams in the last month of out relationship.. just to well "experience" blah blah whatever you may want to call it.. but she said that's what changed the feelings she had for me.... I really don't understand this, the feelings I have always had for her have always been there and nothing changed for me.. Personally I used to do that stuff often when going out and just chillin with friend's before I met her so that's why I feel thats the reason why the way I felt about her didnt change..

I understand it's a type of psychedelic, and does make you feel different/more extreme but how is it possible it makes you change the way you love someone and care for them or even fall out of love....

Has anyone been in this situation or has ever known of anyone that this has happened to?... Possibly not but just over that period of a month.. I think maybe it may have been best but she is still heading down that path.. and now is gonna start doing shrooms.. which kinda concerns me but then again I think maybe it will wake her up because right now she isnt in any emoitional state to be involved or really function or progress. Ugh I dont know how to explain it.. Just need some advice.. harsh or helpful would both well help

Mydriasis

I think she is either lying or she doesn't know what changed her feelings about you.

Don't worry about her doing things like mushrooms. Chances are they will shove all of her negative actions right in her face.

If I were you I would have seperated myself from her. It's unhealthy imo to be hung up on one person who has changed or isn't loving you back. Your in love with who she was, and not who she is right now.

Though Ketamine, Cocaine, and Exctasy are not the root clause for her change in love towards you. Sure these drugs alter the perception temporarily, and in a way forever. But if she really loved you, she'd love you through any drug.

-this part of my response is all intuition and can be ignored if you'd like-

Chances are your guys's drug use was triggered by depression or a sense of being lost(not knowing how the rest of your relationship was going to play out)? I'm guessing this was a high-school love?

If she is a flat-out K, cocaine, or X addict then it would make more sense to me. Addiction makes people tend to only care for themselves. Though I think the real problem here is, the fire was dieing out between you two. She got burnt out, you didn't.

If drugs are the main priority in her life, than I'd honestly stay away. I've run into something somewhat similar, but from the other end. When this happened to me If the girl I was with would have just stayed away than she would have been a lot better off.

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fenderbender

fuck this is creepily similar to what im going through right now.


loving someone and them not loving you anymore fuckin SUCKS

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Imagine there's no heaven,It's easy if you try

<3

Mafoo

mydriasis summed up what i was gonna say.

its hard to care about anything in a serious way when youre in a khole or rolling balls

honestly, you love her but you guys arent going to ever be good for eachother with the drug history you share.

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PLUR
For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return

The Rev

I don't know how old you are, but I get the feeling you're pretty young still, and when you are young, shit changes alot, especially feelings. I doubt that the ketamine or any other drug would snap her out of being in love. I think it has more to do with the fickle nature of young women (and men), and the problems that she is not dealing with by constantly stuffing chemicals into her pie hole.

Love is never more intense than when you're young, too, so I know how you feel. The tragedy is, it's also never more fleeting. In fact, if I were to venture a guess, I would say that love, and how we handled it, is the main reason most old timers like myself wish we had it to do over again. It's a gift and a curse, young love.

Hang in there.



The Rev

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Mafoo

im not even an old timer at 21 but i wish i could do all my romances over

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PLUR
For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return

wnfakind

It's bizarr to say this.. but the connection we have and I have to believe what she say's as of last week were back together... 8 months apart.. longest time of time life, but just as of now dosnt seem like a moment was lost in our connection we have..

I wrote on the back of a painting she made me and I gave back to her, is love besides what ever eles fills the moment what we have will last forever love the greatest chemical reaction... Drugs blind true feeling's show them but makes you question ignoring what you can build and have on a dailiy feeling..

It's hard to explain I hate hearing what everyone eles says, as of getting back together they talk like she is just an object she isnt that to me she's an equal another live living the same thing but connectiing... ugh.. it does sound like a trust issue, iit's hard to believe but 8 months past and the people she knows im just hanging out with and they still talk shit about her and I feel because I know ive done things "experienced" what i think i needed to but when it comes to this one feeling I have about my ex well my gf now she feels the same..

True love.. another conecpt but wow two souls linked.. should just take it as it is and believe what she says before I fuck it up.

Mafoo

id believe it, but keep your guard up my friend.
you have to remember that even when its the two of you together you are still yourself, and she is herself. people are always going to be more true to themselves, so she may "change" her feelings again and follow them away from you in the future.

i seriously wish you the best, love is such a bitch sometimes, and it can feel like your life is ending when love begins to fade.

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PLUR
For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return

Makros_01

i dont want to do love over.. no way! it didn't work and im done!

go hard son and don't give up your oportunity. I say, let the guard down! trust and worry not for your heart. to leave a guard up is to deny her access to parts of you. you only live once. sometimetimes it works and sometimes it doesnt.
dont let concern over the 'it wont work bit' turn what COULD work, bad!

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sometimes i'm drunk.

wnfakind

props an open soul is an alive one