Ex contacted me on facebook

ChiefBongWater · 03-01-2011, 05:45 PM

An ex of mine sent me a message on facebook over the weekend. Its been about 2.5 years since ive last spoken with her and it ended pretty bad back then.

This was one of the first few girls that I really cared for, she really meant a lot to me and I was really happy. She ends up breaking up with me outta the blue and i find out that shes been cheating on me for a while. It was a real messy break up. Plus I was young/ immature and acted kinda crazy when i found out.

Im not sure what to do though. Should I ignore the message? Im wondering why she would contact me now all of a sudden...

Any thoughts? Any advice dealing with ex's contacting you after break up?

EDIT: this is my 666th post

osirus2020 · 03-01-2011, 06:04 PM

Fuck her, I would.

Terry · 03-01-2011, 06:27 PM

Yea at least meet up with or talk to her, see what she has to say. If anything you can get some ex sex which can be fun.

**Mafoo** · 03-01-2011, 09:50 PM

depending on what her message said, id just kick back and be indifferent about it. if shes got something to say let her, but i wouldnt go trying to organize anything beyond possibly returning the message.

what did the message say anyhow?

ChiefBongWater · 03-02-2011, 12:12 AM

yeah im not trying to really have her back in my life at all. Im not saying i wouldnt like to hit it one last time, but its not worth it.

the message was real vague and pointless.

" Ive come in peace; whats up? "

Captain Cannabis · 03-02-2011, 12:31 AM

probably not worth the drama

Grieves · 03-02-2011, 12:40 AM

If you aren't getting laid on a semi-reg basis, ex-sex

If you have some kickbacks don't bother...

oh yeah the emotional stuff

Letting her reopen those old emotional wounds within herself/you isn't worth it, unless you need a hug for closure or some gay shit...

pussywillow · 03-02-2011, 05:08 AM

from a female perspective, she could just be doing this because she wants attention from you and she knows that you used to care for her so maybe she just wants to see if she still has her nails in your back so to speak. She could just be bored. I personally think your response should depend on her message.

But her past behaviors are immature (regardless of how you responded to the information). I think that if anything, your response just shows you aren't a shit head and cared. Anyways, unless it sounds like she's grown up a bit since you last saw her, I wouldnt put any energy into her because it sounds like she's already been a waste of time.

Also that's kind of sweet closure when someone that fucked you over wants to hang out again..you can just be like, oh yeah...i remember you...but im not interested. lol

adventure · 03-02-2011, 07:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by osirus2020

Fuck her, I would.

Thanks Yoda

Black · 03-20-2011, 03:49 PM

Post the message.

Jester4yall · 03-20-2011, 04:06 PM

Post 666 for a reason... Be very careful chief, if there is still feelings for her go very very slow if you start communicating back and forth. I found that I couldn't be friends with my xwife after we split up. I still had too many feelings so I just disappeared and cut all ties. Just my abbreviated experience

turmaline · 03-20-2011, 04:14 PM

Find out if she's on the "Rebound".

Cerebro · 03-21-2011, 02:14 AM

I like old friends, nothing like chatting with someone who knows alot of your shit already.
I'm usually someone who assumes the best about peoples intentions, it keeps me open to more possibilities. Also more open to being hurt, but I dont mind hurt, teaches you stuff.
I'd message her back telling her what's up, it'll but a smile on your face. No point trying to guess were it might go to, bitches aren't that easy to figure or control mang, but have some fun.

Roach · 03-21-2011, 07:16 AM

Quote:

Should I ignore the message?

not at all.

I'd reply, with "everythings fine now that you're not around" (or something perhaps not so abrasive)...and leave it at that.

re-striking a relationship....nah, probably not a good idea.

been there, done that.

fenderbender · 03-21-2011, 05:08 PM

At least see what she wants...

Jester4yall · 03-21-2011, 05:21 PM

Anything new to report CBW?

ChiefBongWater · 03-21-2011, 08:16 PM

Thanks for all the replies everyone, Most of you were right when saying that shes probably looking for attention. Heres how the short convo went...

Her: I've come in peace :P , whats up?

Me: Hey whats going on, Howve ya been?

Her: Im 21 now and Im awesomeee & everything is amazing! what about you?

And I left it at that, didnt get back to her haha. I take that as her just trying to show off and get attention at how well off she's apparently been. Ive been fine with no contact from her, I dont need/want to be pulled back into that hole.

thanks again for all the replies/input/advice

EDIT: Plus i scrolled through some of her pictures..... she must have gained a couple pounds since turning 21

Jester4yall · 03-21-2011, 09:28 PM

Beer gut lmfao.. I think you handled that very well. She was definitely up to NO GOOD. Well played CBW well played

Cerebro · 03-21-2011, 11:28 PM

nah, that's weak sauce imo

**SageTree** · 03-22-2011, 06:03 AM

Is this the lady you split up with two January's ago? Maybe my memory is sketch... but I feel like we had a talk about the initial split up in Jan '10.

Sounds like a game though dude..... I would only send out your pawns for now, SAVE THE QUEEN!

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChiefBongWater

Thanks for all the replies everyone, Most of you were right when saying that shes probably looking for attention. Heres how the short convo went...

Her: I've come in peace :P , whats up?

Me: Hey whats going on, Howve ya been?

Her: Im 21 now and Im awesomeee & everything is amazing! what about you?

And I left it at that, didnt get back to her haha. I take that as her just trying to show off and get attention at how well off she's apparently been. Ive been fine with no contact from her, I dont need/want to be pulled back into that hole.

thanks again for all the replies/input/advice

EDIT: Plus i scrolled through some of her pictures..... she must have gained a couple pounds since turning 21

03-01-2011, 05:45 PM	#1 (permalink)
ChiefBongWater a lot of grease Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Pittsburgh Posts: 1,056 Thanks: 135 Thanked 315 Times in 223 Posts	Ex contacted me on facebook An ex of mine sent me a message on facebook over the weekend. Its been about 2.5 years since ive last spoken with her and it ended pretty bad back then. This was one of the first few girls that I really cared for, she really meant a lot to me and I was really happy. She ends up breaking up with me outta the blue and i find out that shes been cheating on me for a while. It was a real messy break up. Plus I was young/ immature and acted kinda crazy when i found out. Im not sure what to do though. Should I ignore the message? Im wondering why she would contact me now all of a sudden... Any thoughts? Any advice dealing with ex's contacting you after break up? EDIT: this is my 666th post __________________ Straight No Chaser Bridgez, Boobs, Beer

03-01-2011, 06:27 PM	#3 (permalink)
Terry Militant Pacifist Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Moscow, Idaho Posts: 8,535 Thanks: 2,128 Thanked 2,391 Times in 1,189 Posts	Yea at least meet up with or talk to her, see what she has to say. If anything you can get some ex sex which can be fun. __________________ There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. -Sylvia Plath

03-01-2011, 09:50 PM	#4 (permalink)
Mafoo nice daze Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: the anguish of anticipated transformation Posts: 5,975 Thanks: 3,776 Thanked 2,652 Times in 1,698 Posts	depending on what her message said, id just kick back and be indifferent about it. if shes got something to say let her, but i wouldnt go trying to organize anything beyond possibly returning the message. what did the message say anyhow? __________________ PLUR For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return

03-02-2011, 12:12 AM	#5 (permalink)
ChiefBongWater a lot of grease Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Pittsburgh Posts: 1,056 Thanks: 135 Thanked 315 Times in 223 Posts	yeah im not trying to really have her back in my life at all. Im not saying i wouldnt like to hit it one last time, but its not worth it. the message was real vague and pointless. " Ive come in peace; whats up? " __________________ Straight No Chaser Bridgez, Boobs, Beer

03-02-2011, 12:31 AM	#6 (permalink)
Captain Cannabis safety word: more Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: m.i.a. Posts: 13,922 Thanks: 2,705 Thanked 3,174 Times in 1,812 Posts	probably not worth the drama __________________ fuck the monkeys

03-02-2011, 12:40 AM	#7 (permalink)
Grieves The Worst Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Interstate 8 Posts: 12,090 Blog Entries: 1 Thanks: 2,577 Thanked 3,117 Times in 1,712 Posts	If you aren't getting laid on a semi-reg basis, ex-sex If you have some kickbacks don't bother... oh yeah the emotional stuff Letting her reopen those old emotional wounds within herself/you isn't worth it, unless you need a hug for closure or some gay shit... __________________ "And no matter what they said dollar is not your friend and it's the feelings that are hard to know are the feelings that all come slow No matter what they said dollar is not your friend and these feelings that so hard to know are the feelings that wont let go No don't let go, till you find a home World Unite and I'll love you forever"

03-02-2011, 05:08 AM	#8 (permalink)
pussywillow YaHookan Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 52 Thanks: 5 Thanked 8 Times in 4 Posts	from a female perspective, she could just be doing this because she wants attention from you and she knows that you used to care for her so maybe she just wants to see if she still has her nails in your back so to speak. She could just be bored. I personally think your response should depend on her message. But her past behaviors are immature (regardless of how you responded to the information). I think that if anything, your response just shows you aren't a shit head and cared. Anyways, unless it sounds like she's grown up a bit since you last saw her, I wouldnt put any energy into her because it sounds like she's already been a waste of time. Also that's kind of sweet closure when someone that fucked you over wants to hang out again..you can just be like, oh yeah...i remember you...but im not interested. lol

03-20-2011, 03:49 PM	#10 (permalink)
Black YaHookan Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 761 Thanks: 367 Thanked 312 Times in 197 Posts	Post the message. __________________ formality known as higherlearner84, la coka nostra and finding balance.

03-20-2011, 04:06 PM	#11 (permalink)
Jester4yall Spark It or Park It Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Africa Posts: 3,659 Thanks: 2,775 Thanked 1,320 Times in 946 Posts	Post 666 for a reason... Be very careful chief, if there is still feelings for her go very very slow if you start communicating back and forth. I found that I couldn't be friends with my xwife after we split up. I still had too many feelings so I just disappeared and cut all ties. Just my abbreviated experience __________________ http://i.imgur.com/CTV2E.gif In matters of style, swim with the current; In matters of principle, stand like a rock. -Thomas Jefferson You will encounter many distractions and many temptations to put your goal aside: The security of a job, a wife who wants kids, whatever. But if you hang in there, always following your vision, I have no doubt you will succeed. - Larry Flynt

03-20-2011, 04:14 PM	#12 (permalink)
turmaline hotdog! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: CANADA Posts: 1,674 Thanks: 513 Thanked 927 Times in 536 Posts	Find out if she's on the "Rebound". __________________ "I'd rather a frontallabotomy...th an a bottleinfrontofme".

03-21-2011, 05:21 PM	#16 (permalink)
Jester4yall Spark It or Park It Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Africa Posts: 3,659 Thanks: 2,775 Thanked 1,320 Times in 946 Posts	Anything new to report CBW? __________________ http://i.imgur.com/CTV2E.gif In matters of style, swim with the current; In matters of principle, stand like a rock. -Thomas Jefferson You will encounter many distractions and many temptations to put your goal aside: The security of a job, a wife who wants kids, whatever. But if you hang in there, always following your vision, I have no doubt you will succeed. - Larry Flynt

03-21-2011, 08:16 PM	#17 (permalink)
ChiefBongWater a lot of grease Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Pittsburgh Posts: 1,056 Thanks: 135 Thanked 315 Times in 223 Posts	Thanks for all the replies everyone, Most of you were right when saying that shes probably looking for attention. Heres how the short convo went... Her: I've come in peace :P , whats up? Me: Hey whats going on, Howve ya been? Her: Im 21 now and Im awesomeee & everything is amazing! what about you? And I left it at that, didnt get back to her haha. I take that as her just trying to show off and get attention at how well off she's apparently been. Ive been fine with no contact from her, I dont need/want to be pulled back into that hole. thanks again for all the replies/input/advice EDIT: Plus i scrolled through some of her pictures..... she must have gained a couple pounds since turning 21 __________________ Straight No Chaser Bridgez, Boobs, Beer

03-21-2011, 09:28 PM	#18 (permalink)
Jester4yall Spark It or Park It Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Africa Posts: 3,659 Thanks: 2,775 Thanked 1,320 Times in 946 Posts	Beer gut lmfao.. I think you handled that very well. She was definitely up to NO GOOD. Well played CBW well played __________________ http://i.imgur.com/CTV2E.gif In matters of style, swim with the current; In matters of principle, stand like a rock. -Thomas Jefferson You will encounter many distractions and many temptations to put your goal aside: The security of a job, a wife who wants kids, whatever. But if you hang in there, always following your vision, I have no doubt you will succeed. - Larry Flynt

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