YaHooka Forums  

Go Back   YaHooka Forums > Helpful Buds > Guidance And Support
Home FAQ Social Groups Links Mark Forums Read

Guidance And Support Questions and issues of a serious nature including health, medicinal cannabis use, personal issues, relationship issues, communication problems, parenting, cross-generational issues, problems with parents, giving up and overcoming obstacles.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-13-2014, 10:35 PM   #1 (permalink)
S CLUB 7 4 EVA
 
veda's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 7,536
Thanks: 99
Thanked 586 Times in 857 Posts
stuff

im making a thread here just because i dont want it going off the rails like the usual ffa thread does, its just a vent i guess more than anything.

Things are going unexpectedly great for me in my life right now. I have all the things that "normal" people have, love my fambly and good place to live and all that, i now have an appt with a doctor to get my lazy eye fixed that i have wanted to get straightened for a looooong time.

I have this great job that i like. i work in a facility that cares for/helps/provides stability for abused and neglected children aged 5-12. so here's the thing: kids say some absolutely heartbreaking things, and i hear heartbreaking things about them, their situations, things i overhear when talking to a parent on the phone, things parents say when dropping kids off at the place, things other staff members say.
I signed an confidentiality agreement, but i wouldnt go into specifics anyway, its just... shit. theres some pretty fucked up shit going on out there. its easy to be all philosophical about it when its on the news or internets, but when its right there in front of you up close and personal, it can be rough to deal. thats all.
veda is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to veda For This Useful Post:
BudSniffer (09-14-2014), CheeseburgerEd (09-28-2014), fenderbender (01-08-2018), mothernature (09-13-2014), Roach (01-18-2018), Sage Tree (09-14-2014), The Rev (09-27-2014), turmaline (09-13-2014)
Old 09-13-2014, 10:41 PM   #2 (permalink)
KONERS!
 
turmaline's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 9,650
Thanks: 5,196
Thanked 9,912 Times in 4,637 Posts
I'd need a councelor for a job like that... Just sayin.

Good job.

Thank god for people like you.
__________________
BONERZ!


"I browse at work. If some nerd had a problem with dicks I'd stare him in the eyes then magnify the picture in question without saying a word."

"Shit is cash I love to lose myself to narrative while simultaneously soaking in nature and watching the frogs bang."
__________________
Terry


"NCC: A Cautionary Tale of Condoms and Crises", OR "YOLO: Ballsack Barnacles & Babies"

silverleaf
turmaline is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to turmaline For This Useful Post:
BudSniffer (09-14-2014), mothernature (09-13-2014), Sage Tree (09-14-2014), veda (09-14-2014)
Old 09-13-2014, 10:41 PM   #3 (permalink)
S CLUB 7 4 EVA
 
veda's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 7,536
Thanks: 99
Thanked 586 Times in 857 Posts
one more thing i was thinking was that when off the job, it must be better to just turn that off and dont think about it, but it still new so im having trouble doing that.
and its not like i havent seen some shit in my time. im goign to bed now

edit: yeah thanx turm, that actually helps
veda is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-14-2014, 01:21 AM   #4 (permalink)
tragically misinformed
 
kitch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Bay State
Posts: 10,458
Thanks: 776
Thanked 3,072 Times in 1,744 Posts
Social workers are saints. Signing up to have your heart crushed every day for the least money of any professional career must be a tough decision. I wonder how any of y'all stay sane
__________________
resurrection comes
not from iron nails and battered bodies,
but from the pungent warmth
of rich soil and rotting leaves
where dry seeds sprout
and grow toward the sun.

kitch is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to kitch For This Useful Post:
veda (09-14-2014)
Old 09-14-2014, 04:38 AM   #5 (permalink)
Al Talib
 
Sage Tree's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Posts: 33,850
Blog Entries: 26
Thanks: 20,412
Thanked 13,947 Times in 8,728 Posts
Glad you enjoy your work Veda.

I know the feel of 'not handling it well' but realised that is part of the journey,
and part of what makes me a great helper.

You open your heart and let their life mingle with yours, not a cold application of helping.
Your connecting with empahty, and believe it or not, not every helper does that.
That pain is a gift in disguise, but make sure to have a healthy relationship with it.

My suggestion is make sure to do something to help you process it,
outside of letting it sit or thinking about it... Its OK to remember them when you aren't there.

Hot yoga, some counseling, running and journalling were some keys for me.
Its a cue to dive deep into your spiritual purpose, as a helper.
Even Jesus and Buddha needed some alone time to practice.

And its OK to share stories here.
Just don't mention things that are names or stories that might be in headlines.
Things that are indicative of who they are, and you'll be fine with you agreement.

Ypou need to share sorrow AND joy... Some stories need told.

Reach out to me in a PM as well.
I had a definite peak of 'not handling it right' before I got it together,
And maybe I can be of use to you,
Especially since I think we have a common core of reasoning for extending our Self,
to those who need us too carry their load for a while and to walk with them.

The first rule in being a first responder is making sure you aren't injuring yourself in the aid.
Sure you'll feel the cold water and hot flames, but keep your head,
or you'll be of little use to them or yourself.

Bless your heart and the lives it will touch and change.
We can't save the world, but we where as shit can make the difference one day at a time,
And if we can... A little more. This is present moment awareness at its fullest.
Sage Tree is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Sage Tree For This Useful Post:
mothernature (09-28-2014), veda (09-14-2014)
Old 09-27-2014, 06:51 PM   #6 (permalink)
Life is Subtext
 
The Rev's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Samsara
Posts: 25,281
Thanks: 14,968
Thanked 11,488 Times in 5,559 Posts
I think you just have to accept that you can't fix it all, maybe you can't fix any of it, but at least you're trying your best to make things right for these people, and that's what this world needs.

My Ch'an teacher once told a story about a hurricane that washed a shit ton of crabs up on the beach. This old guy goes out and starts throwing them back in the water, but a younger guy asks him, "Why do you bother? You can't throw them all back? What difference can you make?" and the old guy says, "It makes a difference for this one" as he throws it back into the sea.

That's the fucked up thing in life. You can't make the world better. You can just help one or two people here or there. And the weight of shit you have to carry to do that is immense.



The Rev
__________________


Budforce - My Friend
August 29, 1973- May 25, 2012


The Rev is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to The Rev For This Useful Post:
SoK (09-28-2014), veda (01-09-2018)
Old 09-27-2014, 07:23 PM   #7 (permalink)
Special Delivery
 
Mercury's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: The States
Posts: 10,627
Thanks: 486
Thanked 968 Times in 639 Posts
Don't worry about children, adults, dogs, trees or anything else. You can only control what you do with yourself. Lead by example.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by DdC View Post
Oh Mercury eat shit for us again eh, you're a funny lil turd.
Mercury is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-28-2014, 04:49 AM   #8 (permalink)
Not easy bein cheesy
 
CheeseburgerEd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Cheeseburgerville
Posts: 384
Thanks: 623
Thanked 375 Times in 196 Posts
I used to read a blog about someone who worked in the same kind of place. It was fascinating but also indeed heartbreaking at times. Im not sure how anyone can be around that all day and still function.
__________________
I was young too, I felt just like you. Hated authority, hated all my bosses, thought they were full of shit. Well it's like they say: If you're not a rebel at the age of twenty, you got no heart. But if you haven't turned establishment by thirty, you got no brains. Because there are no storybook romances. No fairy tale endings. So before you run out to change the world, ask yourself: What do you really want?
CheeseburgerEd is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-28-2014, 05:07 AM   #9 (permalink)
Keezheekoni
 
Geeno's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Scam City
Posts: 30,718
Thanks: 4,802
Thanked 10,317 Times in 4,893 Posts
Taken from r/bestofnetflix

Short Term 12 (2013) "Grace, a compassionate young supervisor at a foster care facility, works with her boyfriend and colleague, Mason, to help at-risk teens. But when a new charge dredges up memories of her own troubled past, Grace's tough exterior begins eroding." Amazing movie guys, check it out!

idk if thats relevant but sounds like a cool movie
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mercury View Post
i've struck the absolute perfect balance between gay and smart

☆ ★ ☆ ★ ☆ ★ we JACKED, you mad?☆ ★ ☆ ★ ☆ ★
Geeno is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Geeno For This Useful Post:
CheeseburgerEd (09-28-2014)
Old 01-07-2018, 11:42 AM   #10 (permalink)
S CLUB 7 4 EVA
 
veda's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Posts: 7,536
Thanks: 99
Thanked 586 Times in 857 Posts
Update:

I got the surgery to straighten out my crooked eye and everything went well, I dont even think about it anymore. I recently quit that job. I started myfitnesspal and lost 20 lbs and it makes a big difference (10 more to go). been really busy tho, this is a rare occasion that i can even read or post on here. I was sorry to hear about Zoltron passing, not to mention all the other yahookans that are gone.
Anyway, i dont know what else to say, i just wanted to post something.
veda is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to veda For This Useful Post:
BudSniffer (01-09-2018), Captain Cannabis (01-07-2018), fenderbender (01-08-2018), Jonas (01-08-2018), kitch (01-07-2018), mothernature (01-07-2018), Sage Tree (01-07-2018), turmaline (01-18-2018)
Old 01-07-2018, 01:30 PM   #11 (permalink)
safety word: more
 
Captain Cannabis's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: m.i.a.
Posts: 21,011
Thanks: 5,666
Thanked 7,979 Times in 4,168 Posts
i was wondering what you were up too. glad to see you stop by
__________________
fuck the monkeys
Captain Cannabis is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Captain Cannabis For This Useful Post:
fenderbender (01-08-2018), Sage Tree (01-07-2018), veda (01-09-2018)
Old 01-18-2018, 07:28 AM   #12 (permalink)
Victoria Aut Mors
 
Roach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Posts: 8,871
Thanks: 2,807
Thanked 2,456 Times in 1,782 Posts
I agree with ya veda. And feel for you. Reminds me of the serenity prayer. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, change the things I can, and know the difference between the two.
Roach
__________________
לזיין את הקופים

Last edited by Roach; 01-18-2018 at 07:38 AM.
Roach is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Roach For This Useful Post:
mothernature (01-18-2018), turmaline (01-18-2018)
Old 01-18-2018, 08:23 PM   #13 (permalink)
KONERS!
 
turmaline's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: CANADA
Posts: 9,650
Thanks: 5,196
Thanked 9,912 Times in 4,637 Posts
Glad to see you post too.
Glad to hear from you!
__________________
BONERZ!


"I browse at work. If some nerd had a problem with dicks I'd stare him in the eyes then magnify the picture in question without saying a word."

"Shit is cash I love to lose myself to narrative while simultaneously soaking in nature and watching the frogs bang."
__________________
Terry


"NCC: A Cautionary Tale of Condoms and Crises", OR "YOLO: Ballsack Barnacles & Babies"

silverleaf
turmaline is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to turmaline For This Useful Post:
Roach (01-19-2018)
Old 01-19-2018, 12:19 PM   #14 (permalink)
Victoria Aut Mors
 
Roach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Posts: 8,871
Thanks: 2,807
Thanked 2,456 Times in 1,782 Posts
Winter quarters carnival de Powers & Thomas Midway Entertainment for the last three years and trolling my favorite site. @ 66 can still deadlift half ton. Yes I smoke a gram of loud a day.
__________________
לזיין את הקופים
Roach is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Roach For This Useful Post:
turmaline (01-20-2018)
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:24 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
Inactive Reminders By Icora Web Design