YaHooka Forums  

Go Back   YaHooka Forums > Helpful Buds > Guidance And Support
Home FAQ Social Groups Links Mark Forums Read

Guidance And Support Questions and issues of a serious nature including health, medicinal cannabis use, personal issues, relationship issues, communication problems, parenting, cross-generational issues, problems with parents, giving up and overcoming obstacles.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-01-2018, 04:40 PM   #1 (permalink)
Derp?
 
fenderbender's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: new jersey
Posts: 12,089
Thanks: 22,255
Thanked 6,863 Times in 3,937 Posts
Unhappy Idk what to title this

Hi. Been a while. Hope everyone is doing well.

Well... ive been shitty. I stopped coming here a while back because i was fucking up. Or at least that's why i think i stopped checking in. Had easy access to excess opiate pharmaceuticals. Straddled the addiction line for a bit but eventually fell in. I started doing opiates at like 17, on and off, but somehow always managed to avoid physical addiction all those years. Well it finally got me. Wow does withdrawal suck. Never felt so insane holy shit. Im 13 days clean of opiates now. Feeling better in that regard but still dealing with paws type symptoms. I started smoking weed again while detoxing. Helped immensely at first but now it's not at all so i gotta stop that too. Plan on taking my sobriety more serious now for the first time in my life. Nobody in my life knows anything. Somehow kept it secret.

However that's not even why im posting here. In typical fashion, right when im feeling a little better, my life crashes down again.

This past week my father has deteriorated mentally to a pretty significant degree. He was out of it for a few days, but not totally out of the norm until Sunday. Was much more confused and disoriented to the point where i took him to the hospital. "Where are we", not knowing the date or year and not making sense etc. Not like sudden stroke tier but just sudden significant decrease in mental faculties and confusion. All tests came back normal. Wasnt his liver cancer causing it. Neurologist said today that he might just be deteriorating. He had alcohol induced wernikes or "wet brain, like 5-6 years ago, but nearly fully recovered. Hasnt drank a drop since. Might stem from that idk. Very sudden shift though. Like the course of a week. Idk why. Thought he was just high from his pain meds at first but apparently not. Theyre now talking about basically just sending him to a rehab/nursing home type place.

See i prepared for my father's death. His liver cancer is a terminal illness and likely he only had a few years. Ive given that ample thought and faced that. Would probably have handled it well honestly.

This though has totally caught me off guard and i have no idea what to do. Idk if i can handle like low-mid level dementia tier mental problems with him. That just seems like a nightmare. Im thinking all sorts of fucked up thoughts. No idea what to do or think.

Not only that but i havent talked to my sister. She now knows something is up but not fully. I have no idea what to say to her. I dont think i can handle that conversation. Shes not picking up for my mom either but is texting asking me whats up. Up until i got news today i was actually pissed/resentful towards her for not being around to help me with him and never even checking in. Now i just dont know what to say though. Id love to just fully shield her from it all but idk if that's possible or evem right/good. Idk.

Wtf yahooka. Life really likes to kick me in the balls lol. It's crazy.

So yeah. Idk. In times of trouble im just turning to my yahooka fam again.

Fuck. Im a mess guys. All i want is to not be. A good life feels like it's in reach but the at the same time im fucking drowning. No idea what to do.
__________________
<3
fenderbender is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-01-2018, 05:03 PM   #2 (permalink)
Satanic Hispanic
 
moketweed's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Nap town, IN
Posts: 2,477
Thanks: 3,858
Thanked 1,773 Times in 1,055 Posts
Sorry to hear of your troubles! I’m sure I have no advice you’d like to hear, so just stay safe and I hope everything turns around for you.
__________________
Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool or a coward
Whoever cannot take care of himself without that law is both
For a wounded man shall say to his assailant
"If I live, I will kill you. If I die, you are forgiven"
Such is the rule of honor

Omerta
moketweed is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to moketweed For This Useful Post:
fenderbender (05-02-2018)
Old 05-02-2018, 04:53 AM   #3 (permalink)
devils advocate
 
kamikazi89's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 6,970
Blog Entries: 1
Thanks: 3,195
Thanked 1,950 Times in 1,302 Posts
unless your sister is 6 you probably should get her involved...you'll both regret it if you don't at least try
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellis D. View Post
we need to make the wheels out of pizza.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Governor View Post
Time Bandits!







What's wrong with you people?
katie west is the best


Trump is a pussy


kamikazi89 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to kamikazi89 For This Useful Post:
fenderbender (05-02-2018), mothernature (05-04-2018), silverleaf (05-05-2018)
Old 05-02-2018, 09:20 AM   #4 (permalink)
safety word: more
 
Captain Cannabis's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: m.i.a.
Posts: 21,017
Thanks: 5,671
Thanked 7,982 Times in 4,170 Posts
<3

come chat in irc if you need someone to talk too. i'm going through some really terrible times too so we can both say "wow that sux" to each other and then feel better.
__________________
fuck the monkeys
Captain Cannabis is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Captain Cannabis For This Useful Post:
fenderbender (05-02-2018)
Old 05-03-2018, 10:19 AM   #5 (permalink)
tragically misinformed
 
kitch's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Bay State
Posts: 10,458
Thanks: 776
Thanked 3,072 Times in 1,744 Posts
Capt I was gonna ask how you were doing actually. Hope things are getting better.

Fender good job on making a start staying clean. If you need any advice or help with placement or anything at all just msg me. Sorry about your dad. It's good you'll be able to be more present for him now. Just remember to set aside time for your sobriety and yourself.
__________________
resurrection comes
not from iron nails and battered bodies,
but from the pungent warmth
of rich soil and rotting leaves
where dry seeds sprout
and grow toward the sun.

kitch is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to kitch For This Useful Post:
fenderbender (05-04-2018)
Old 05-03-2018, 11:03 AM   #6 (permalink)
Learner
 
Sir-Ex's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 21,583
Thanks: 4,945
Thanked 9,545 Times in 5,440 Posts
fenderbender, man that sucks



I have no advice because I suck at life advice but I want you to know that I'm rooting for you
__________________
Smile
▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▓▒▒▒▒
▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▓▒▒▒▒
▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒
▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒
▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
Link to my blog
Sir-Ex is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Sir-Ex For This Useful Post:
fenderbender (05-04-2018)
Old 05-04-2018, 01:37 PM   #7 (permalink)
ancientbongmaster
 
mothernature's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 3,723
Thanks: 8,728
Thanked 4,289 Times in 2,078 Posts
love you Bendy.
__________________
Sometimes sleep is the best revenge- Luke



BLACK LIVES MATTER


RESIST
mothernature is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to mothernature For This Useful Post:
fenderbender (05-12-2018)
Old 05-07-2018, 08:45 AM   #8 (permalink)
safety word: more
 
Captain Cannabis's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: m.i.a.
Posts: 21,017
Thanks: 5,671
Thanked 7,982 Times in 4,170 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by kitch View Post
Capt I was gonna ask how you were doing actually. Hope things are getting better.
don't want to hijack fb's thread. pm me or come chat
__________________
fuck the monkeys
Captain Cannabis is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:41 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
Inactive Reminders By Icora Web Design