The Rev

I've decided to give quitting alcohol another go. For those of you who remember the dark times of ages past, I quit for about a year, then started again about a year ago. I haven't drank for about a week, now, and haven't been drinking nearly as much as before, anyway, but I still feel the need.

I have certain areas of my life I want to make better, and among them, the most important is belief in myself. Quitting, then starting, over and over, makes me feel like I can't keep a promise to myself. This feeling carries over into every area of my life where I must decide on, and stick to, a course of action. In a word, it makes me feel powerless in my own life.

Besides, the last time I quit, my spiritual practice got a real boost. I made real strides in meditation, and in the development of my own beliefs and philosophy. I'd like to get back on that path too.

So, I have a week under my belt, and here I go.



The Rev

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SageTree

Good on ya Rev.

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Mikey

Best of luck dude, I know exactly how you feel and what your going through.

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RIP Gov

José

well if you've really gone a week you're already ahead of a lot of people.

hijabihippie

You go, bro.

myxomatosis

Come on Rev, you know you got it in you. Tough beast to kick no doubt, but if you can do a year you can keep it going. Best of luck my friend.

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oh sometimes the blues is just a passing bird
and why can't that always be
tossing aside from your birches crown
just enough dark to see
how you're the light over me

last.fm
blog deal (updated 12/22/11)

stoneric

Good luck man. I plan to follow your lead(again)soon.

OldMan&TheWeed

Rev, I never knew.
Are you a Shakespeare geek as well?

KING HENRY V:
Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more;
Or close the wall up with our English dead.
In peace there's nothing so becomes a man
As modest stillness and humility:
But when the blast of war blows in our ears,
Then imitate the action of the tiger;
Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood,
Disguise fair nature with hard-favour'd rage;
Then lend the eye a terrible aspect;
Let pry through the portage of the head
Like the brass cannon; let the brow o'erwhelm it
As fearfully as doth a galled rock
O'erhang and jutty his confounded base,
Swill'd with the wild and wasteful ocean.
Now set the teeth and stretch the nostril wide,
Hold hard the breath and bend up every spirit
To his full height. On, on, you noblest English.
Whose blood is fet from fathers of war-proof!
Fathers that, like so many Alexanders,
Have in these parts from morn till even fought
And sheathed their swords for lack of argument:
Dishonour not your mothers; now attest
That those whom you call'd fathers did beget you.
Be copy now to men of grosser blood,
And teach them how to war. And you, good yeoman,
Whose limbs were made in England, show us here
The mettle of your pasture; let us swear
That you are worth your breeding; which I doubt not;
For there is none of you so mean and base,
That hath not noble lustre in your eyes.
I see you stand like greyhounds in the slips,
Straining upon the start. The game's afoot:
Follow your spirit, and upon this charge
Cry 'God for Harry, England, and Saint George!'

Henry V, Act III, 1599

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Nintey-three percent of what I say is brilliant, factual information and seven percent is complete bullshit. Have fun deciding which is which.

The Rev

Not so much a geek as just a fan. There's never been a better writer (if it was actually Shakespeare who wrote those plays!) and I particularly like that quote (among many others).

BTW, today is day 11.



The Rev

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The Rev

It's become less, lately, but it still fucks up stuff that's important. I don't give as much attention to my spiritual practice; I tend to procrastinate more, because I feel tired and hung over; and these things make me feel like I'm my own enemy, because I'm not doing what I want to do with myself, and my life. I'm not beating up on myself for drinking. I just see a bad habit that needs to be dropped. A thing which needs to change.

Thanks, Turm.



The Rev

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hijabihippie

As a former friend who is an alcohol abuse counselor said,
"It's not how much or how little you drink that's the problem.
If you drink, and it causes you problems, and you know it causes you problems,
and you drink anyway, you've got a drinking problem."

The Rev

That's about the best way I can imagine anyone putting it.

Gracias, hijabi



The Rev

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stoneric

Sometimes there are no actual problems. It's just a step up in quality.

To quit, that is.

The Rev

Why do you have to be SOOOO tasty!!??

Okay, I fell off that wagon shortly after it got out of town. So, I walked back to town and I'm getting on the next wagon. I'm going on my faith in the notion that practice makes perfect. Hopefully, I am right.

It's really easy for me to bullshit myself about drinking. I don't have all those good stories about trashing my place, or waking up in another state, or whatever, so it's really easy to think that there's no problem. However, I know that the quality of my life improves when I don't have that perpetual half-mast hangover to deal with. I start to feel good, and I start to get my shit together.

Still, when that desire to down a few cold ones comes around, it's so easy to say it's not a big deal, because I don't have any collossal fuck ups to show me it's bad. I think sometimes, tho, that if I just go on the way I have been all these years, that I will come to the end of my life, look back and say, "Oh. THAT was the collossal fuck up I was looking for."

Well, Once more again...



The Rev

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roll

Good luck in quitting alcohol for good Rev (if that's really what you want).

hijabihippie

Suggestion-try non-alcoholic beer, if you like the taste.

toni montana

Good luck dude

The Rev

I tried that once a long time ago, and found that I drank it like I drank regular beer. I'd end up downing a whole six pack in a couple of hours, which seemed kinda pointless and compulsive.

Thanks for the suggestion, tho.



The Rev

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stoneric

Yeah, drinking NA is as addictive as the real shit, plus it's the same price! I'm like you Rev, my life isn't controlled by alcohol but it'd be better off without it. I just ordered some Antabuse online. I figure it will give me the kick in the ass I need. Drinking on that shit will make you plenty sick so it's a good deterent.

Mercury

Rev, a man of your age is liable to fall apart at the seams without a good woman to lay down with.