Your Worst Drug Experience?

SmokeaJoint · 02-19-2011, 01:54 AM

I'm putting this in S&R since it kinda fills a role in harm reduction. Nothing here should motivate any sane person to try these things. If you do any of the stupid shit I do/did, you may very well die. Shit's no joke.

Worst drug experience of my life happened roughly a year ago. I had been binging on huge amounts of high grade coke for about a month as well as assorted quality in methamphetamines and some speed. I had also taken to smoking any pill/pharma I could grab ahold of. I was smoking opiates, Fentanyl, Depakote, anti depressants, anti psychotics, whatever. I had alot of money, multiple solid drug connects, and some of the most potent drugs available in the area. I mixed shit in every way possible, just to see what would happen. Stupid, stupid idea.

Well, it all had to run out sometime. Going that high, its a long fall back down. I ran out of the last of my drugs (coke) after a 9 day binge, no sleep. I had gone through 20 g of Columbian powder the past 3 days alone. I did the last little bump, which did nothing, and then I was out in the worst way.

To begin with, I was very manic and paranoid. I'd been having vivid auditory and visual hallucinations for days by then. No sleep does that to a guy. Then the physical effects began to stack, and quickly. I went from grinding my teeth to chewing my cheeks bloody, then I began to have violent, painful muscle spasms. No telling which hellish cocktail did that. I was way too wound up to sleep, and because I hadn't slept really I kept seeing shadowy figures that I assumed were DEA. Also, I could hear my phone ring and ring, but I'd look at it and nothing. I was also suffering through the cramps, nausea, and shakes of a severe opiate withdrawls.

Nothing since has been THAT bad, but coming off a mean cocktail of vaporized RC's was close. Mixing em isn't a good idea at all.

Take it from me, its only fun until its not, then its the worst ever. If I had known what I do today prior to taking stims, I never would have started. And now I can't stop.

Qui-Bong Jinn · 02-19-2011, 06:39 AM

I'm not stupid enough to try man-made drugs. I rarely take them even when I'm sick, I just smoke pot and my cold or whatever goes away in a day.
My worst experience would have to be with shrooms and salvia, I never realized how much I appreciate a world that doesn't move until I did shrooms 3 days ago. And Salvia is just a dirty drug in my opinion.

Nice self-pity bro, you can stop, stop letting drugs rule your life. Just tell yourself you aren't addicted man, its all in your head, and if you think you aren't addicted (and actually believe it), then it will get easier and easier to just not think about it.

SmokeaJoint · 02-19-2011, 06:46 AM

Self pity lol. Nah, I saw it more as a cautionary statement. I'm addicted to some shit, and its not easy, or even possible at times to say no. If shrooms and salvia is as far into the rabbit hole you've gone then I can see why you'd think that way. Smoke some meth and try to tell me you can just stop, no problem. Shoot some good H and tell me its easy to walk away.

That self pity thing really irks my nerves though.

Qui-Bong Jinn · 02-19-2011, 06:58 AM

I'm not stupid enough to smoke meth or shoot H bro. And I don't give a fuck if I've experienced addiction or not, that kind of attitude is putting you on a crash course to Iwasadumbassville.

Thats good that it irks you, maybe it will help

SmokeaJoint · 02-19-2011, 07:31 AM

Well shit man, I can't fault ya for that but I didn't make this thread to be told how wrong I am. I already know.

I started out as that kid who would "try anything once" but damn that went to shit quick. Trying became binging, and I knew I was kinda in over my head.

Shoulda just stuck with weed.

Qui-Bong Jinn · 02-19-2011, 09:33 AM

I can't say I understand where you're coming from, I've never felt the urge to do harder drugs, for me, weed is the greatest thing on the planet, and I don't feel the need to get higher because I'm already high as fuck

So the best I can do is wish you luck, and hope it gets easier for you to resist temptation. And atleast you can acknowledge that you are on the path to destruction, most people can't even do that. If I were you though, I'd delete all your connects off your phone (except for the weed connects

), therefore you will have no access to anything but marijuana.

Read books, go biking, go for a walk, buy some 3-D puzzles or something man, anything to get your mind off that poison.

Xil · 02-19-2011, 09:49 AM

you dont need numbers to get meth, its everywhere. at lease in rural missouri it is.
i don't fuck with that though, partly because of tails like SaJ's. I know a lot of addicts, both treated and untreated, and saying no isn't a simple matter. Talked to a woman two days ago who was terrified she was going to get drunk on her upcoming birthday and lose the chance to get her kids back...shit isn't easy.

As far as my worst drug experiences, i haven't had too many. Once on acid I accidently gashed the back of my hand pretty well, but it didn't really bother me. Another time I sat down in someone's room, and the door was closed, and lil wayne was playing. I had been doing a lot of reading on ego at the time and i felt his words crawling into my brain like diseased bugs

. i thought i was stuck there, until in a moment of brilliance i got up and left, went to my room and put on some jimi with swamp people playing in the background. felt great in 20 minutes.

many shitty times when drunk. drunk on opiates i've thought my heart was gonna stop. chewed up my lips so bad on stimulants it looked like i had been repeatedly punched in the mouth with a fist full of herpes. it was disgusting for like 3 days (not too bad considering it was a 2 day binge)

SmokeaJoint · 02-19-2011, 09:54 AM

Nah, I got recipes lol. Never had cause to cook any shards, but I know how to if the need arises. Shit, thats a lot of money to be made. Too bad its the #1 hated drug by cops. They really go after the meth suppliers. Okay, too bad is the wrong words, but Idk what the right ones are.

The Rev · 02-19-2011, 12:10 PM

My worst experience was the second time I ever got drunk. I was 16, and the first time I'd had 4 beers so I figured if 4 was fun, 9 had to rule. I spent all night puking and spinning and praying to God to get me through it. I was scared, and I felt like shit. It was terrible.

The Rev

SmokeaJoint · 02-19-2011, 12:13 PM

Ah yeah, I remember some not-too-distant night curled up on the bathroom floor, alcohol poisoned to shit, just saying over and over, "breathe....just breathe". It always feels like dying, then I puke balls and black out.

Luckily I'm not a huge fan of alcohol, so its not gonna do me in.

**Mafoo** · 02-19-2011, 01:06 PM

ive already told my bad psychedelic journeys. brief: 2nd time taking ellis, took 2-3 hits off a roll of unperf(kinda like rev, i thought hey one hit was fun 3 will be awesome), 2-3 hits was about 2 inches long... anyway i was starting to come up way harder than my previous experience, minutes later i got a text from my girl at that time saying she didnt have time for a bf and all this stuff, that was a pretty gut wrenching 10 hours

another time on ellis my friend said he was going to take myself and another friend in the closet and shoot us and then shoot himself. that was fucked.

ive had bad nights with alcohol, i once punched through a door

im over drugs/ alcohol

my_scatterheart · 02-19-2011, 03:12 PM

My worst experiences were watching the person I love OD. /rad

**Mafoo** · 02-19-2011, 03:25 PM

sorry scatter

i didnt even think about things that ive seen happen. i saw my friend take 8 oc 80s and 8 grams of blow in a night and have to get his stomach pumped after puking blood. iwasnt there when he popped, i wouldnt have let him do that.

seen people have seizures at festivals while i was tripping (i feel like tripping leaves me prone to these shitty views). i saw a guy trying to dig on an asphalt dancefloor, he looked like he was completely detached from reality.

i saw a girl at edc 2009 who was being carried around and drooling all over herself

its not a pretty thing when you do drugs the way some people do them

my_scatterheart · 02-19-2011, 03:37 PM

I don't mind being the person that watches out for everyone, but it's definitely left me with images that I can never rid myself of. Horrified and grateful is a tricky dichotomy, but it for sure has helped me to see how beautiful the human body is. It's ability for repair.

SmokeaJoint · 02-19-2011, 03:44 PM

I'd have to be sober and not fucked up myself to see other people going wild with it. But if theres drugs around, I'm doing them so that never happens.

One of these days I'll guestimate how much money I've wasted on drugs and maybe it'll be incentive to quit. Right now though? I havent slept in 50 hrs and frankly numbers are daunting.

my_scatterheart · 02-19-2011, 03:52 PM

It's easy to abstain from dope when you've seen it kill people all your life. It's also easier each time you see someones veins spit up filth. The person it makes them. The person it makes you.
Sobriety is easy, it's addiction that's hard.

As for your situation - quit before you have a real reason to. The place you find when you get to the end of that road isn't as cute as we all make it out to be. Save yourself.

SmokeaJoint · 02-19-2011, 03:56 PM

Hey, you're preaching to the choir here.

When I quit H, I quit H friends too. Same thing with meth. Nobody is allowed to shoot up or load a glass dick in my house. I can't have it near because I know me.

I'm real sorry for the loss, scatter. That sounds rough.

my_scatterheart · 02-19-2011, 04:02 PM

There's a loss for sure. Childhood, most likely. There are things that I wouldn't mind still being naive to. But that asshole is still alive

Guinness record for most ODs, I think. Will love him forever. Wish he could love himself.

Love yourself. The whole lot of you. Forgive yourself for whatever misgivings you remind yourself of on a daily basis.
It's time.

Xil · 02-19-2011, 04:37 PM

what scatters on is some good shit. a lot of people don't have anyone who will love or trust them by the time they hit rock bottom/a low point. Makes it even more of an uphill battle.

Waves · 02-22-2011, 02:43 PM

12 e pills in one night, next day my brain started "zapping" in weird ways

dont as me what that means cuz im only describing how it felt.

that was when i decided to cut down my use

02-19-2011, 06:58 AM	#4 (permalink)
Qui-Bong Jinn Jedi High Council Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Kingston, Ontario Posts: 2,135 Thanks: 911 Thanked 501 Times in 372 Posts	I'm not stupid enough to smoke meth or shoot H bro. And I don't give a fuck if I've experienced addiction or not, that kind of attitude is putting you on a crash course to Iwasadumbassville. Thats good that it irks you, maybe it will help Last edited by Qui-Bong Jinn; 02-19-2011 at 07:04 AM.

02-19-2011, 09:33 AM	#6 (permalink)
Qui-Bong Jinn Jedi High Council Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Kingston, Ontario Posts: 2,135 Thanks: 911 Thanked 501 Times in 372 Posts	I can't say I understand where you're coming from, I've never felt the urge to do harder drugs, for me, weed is the greatest thing on the planet, and I don't feel the need to get higher because I'm already high as fuck So the best I can do is wish you luck, and hope it gets easier for you to resist temptation. And atleast you can acknowledge that you are on the path to destruction, most people can't even do that. If I were you though, I'd delete all your connects off your phone (except for the weed connects ), therefore you will have no access to anything but marijuana. Read books, go biking, go for a walk, buy some 3-D puzzles or something man, anything to get your mind off that poison. Last edited by Qui-Bong Jinn; 02-19-2011 at 09:39 AM.

02-19-2011, 09:49 AM	#7 (permalink)
Xil OD'ing on sobriety Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Mizzura Posts: 3,334 Blog Entries: 1 Thanks: 1,037 Thanked 1,158 Times in 717 Posts	you dont need numbers to get meth, its everywhere. at lease in rural missouri it is. i don't fuck with that though, partly because of tails like SaJ's. I know a lot of addicts, both treated and untreated, and saying no isn't a simple matter. Talked to a woman two days ago who was terrified she was going to get drunk on her upcoming birthday and lose the chance to get her kids back...shit isn't easy. As far as my worst drug experiences, i haven't had too many. Once on acid I accidently gashed the back of my hand pretty well, but it didn't really bother me. Another time I sat down in someone's room, and the door was closed, and lil wayne was playing. I had been doing a lot of reading on ego at the time and i felt his words crawling into my brain like diseased bugs . i thought i was stuck there, until in a moment of brilliance i got up and left, went to my room and put on some jimi with swamp people playing in the background. felt great in 20 minutes. many shitty times when drunk. drunk on opiates i've thought my heart was gonna stop. chewed up my lips so bad on stimulants it looked like i had been repeatedly punched in the mouth with a fist full of herpes. it was disgusting for like 3 days (not too bad considering it was a 2 day binge) __________________ "we'll show these fascists what a couple of hillbillies can do"

02-19-2011, 12:10 PM	#9 (permalink)
The Rev Clear Light Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: In my head, somewhere. Posts: 17,867 Thanks: 5,019 Thanked 5,421 Times in 2,865 Posts	My worst experience was the second time I ever got drunk. I was 16, and the first time I'd had 4 beers so I figured if 4 was fun, 9 had to rule. I spent all night puking and spinning and praying to God to get me through it. I was scared, and I felt like shit. It was terrible. The Rev __________________ Budforce - My Friend August 29, 1973- May 25, 2012

02-19-2011, 01:06 PM	#11 (permalink)
Mafoo nice daze Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: the anguish of anticipated transformation Posts: 5,975 Thanks: 3,776 Thanked 2,652 Times in 1,698 Posts	ive already told my bad psychedelic journeys. brief: 2nd time taking ellis, took 2-3 hits off a roll of unperf(kinda like rev, i thought hey one hit was fun 3 will be awesome), 2-3 hits was about 2 inches long... anyway i was starting to come up way harder than my previous experience, minutes later i got a text from my girl at that time saying she didnt have time for a bf and all this stuff, that was a pretty gut wrenching 10 hours another time on ellis my friend said he was going to take myself and another friend in the closet and shoot us and then shoot himself. that was fucked. ive had bad nights with alcohol, i once punched through a door im over drugs/ alcohol __________________ PLUR For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return

02-19-2011, 06:39 AM	#2 (permalink)
Qui-Bong Jinn Jedi High Council Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Kingston, Ontario Posts: 2,135 Thanks: 911 Thanked 501 Times in 372 Posts	I'm not stupid enough to try man-made drugs. I rarely take them even when I'm sick, I just smoke pot and my cold or whatever goes away in a day. My worst experience would have to be with shrooms and salvia, I never realized how much I appreciate a world that doesn't move until I did shrooms 3 days ago. And Salvia is just a dirty drug in my opinion. Nice self-pity bro, you can stop, stop letting drugs rule your life. Just tell yourself you aren't addicted man, its all in your head, and if you think you aren't addicted (and actually believe it), then it will get easier and easier to just not think about it.

02-19-2011, 03:12 PM	#12 (permalink)
my_scatterheart Today, I am alive. Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: NJ Posts: 3,553 Thanks: 1,487 Thanked 3,328 Times in 1,870 Posts	My worst experiences were watching the person I love OD. /rad __________________ Be mindful even if your mind is full. -J. De La Vega

02-19-2011, 03:25 PM	#13 (permalink)
Mafoo nice daze Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: the anguish of anticipated transformation Posts: 5,975 Thanks: 3,776 Thanked 2,652 Times in 1,698 Posts	sorry scatter i didnt even think about things that ive seen happen. i saw my friend take 8 oc 80s and 8 grams of blow in a night and have to get his stomach pumped after puking blood. iwasnt there when he popped, i wouldnt have let him do that. seen people have seizures at festivals while i was tripping (i feel like tripping leaves me prone to these shitty views). i saw a guy trying to dig on an asphalt dancefloor, he looked like he was completely detached from reality. i saw a girl at edc 2009 who was being carried around and drooling all over herself its not a pretty thing when you do drugs the way some people do them __________________ PLUR For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return

02-19-2011, 03:37 PM	#14 (permalink)
my_scatterheart Today, I am alive. Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: NJ Posts: 3,553 Thanks: 1,487 Thanked 3,328 Times in 1,870 Posts	I don't mind being the person that watches out for everyone, but it's definitely left me with images that I can never rid myself of. Horrified and grateful is a tricky dichotomy, but it for sure has helped me to see how beautiful the human body is. It's ability for repair. __________________ Be mindful even if your mind is full. -J. De La Vega

02-19-2011, 03:52 PM	#16 (permalink)
my_scatterheart Today, I am alive. Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: NJ Posts: 3,553 Thanks: 1,487 Thanked 3,328 Times in 1,870 Posts	It's easy to abstain from dope when you've seen it kill people all your life. It's also easier each time you see someones veins spit up filth. The person it makes them. The person it makes you. Sobriety is easy, it's addiction that's hard. As for your situation - quit before you have a real reason to. The place you find when you get to the end of that road isn't as cute as we all make it out to be. Save yourself. __________________ Be mindful even if your mind is full. -J. De La Vega

02-19-2011, 04:02 PM	#18 (permalink)
my_scatterheart Today, I am alive. Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: NJ Posts: 3,553 Thanks: 1,487 Thanked 3,328 Times in 1,870 Posts	There's a loss for sure. Childhood, most likely. There are things that I wouldn't mind still being naive to. But that asshole is still alive Guinness record for most ODs, I think. Will love him forever. Wish he could love himself. Love yourself. The whole lot of you. Forgive yourself for whatever misgivings you remind yourself of on a daily basis. It's time. __________________ Be mindful even if your mind is full. -J. De La Vega

02-19-2011, 04:37 PM	#19 (permalink)
Xil OD'ing on sobriety Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Mizzura Posts: 3,334 Blog Entries: 1 Thanks: 1,037 Thanked 1,158 Times in 717 Posts	what scatters on is some good shit. a lot of people don't have anyone who will love or trust them by the time they hit rock bottom/a low point. Makes it even more of an uphill battle. __________________ "we'll show these fascists what a couple of hillbillies can do"

02-22-2011, 02:43 PM	#20 (permalink)
Waves Duderino Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: chiburbs Posts: 15,405 Thanks: 991 Thanked 4,036 Times in 2,224 Posts	12 e pills in one night, next day my brain started "zapping" in weird ways dont as me what that means cuz im only describing how it felt. that was when i decided to cut down my use __________________ On this life that we call home The years go fast and the days go so slow

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