vanilla

...and here i wake up now, still not well rested as the sun starts its slow climb back into the sky... and maybe it wasn't so bad after all, sisyphus pushing that boulder back to the top of the hill, beating it everytime. sometimes the hardest part of the day is just getting out of bed, but you wonder what all those others are doing when these eyes aren't on them anymore, how they pass the time in those far removed corners of the world when we reach for some degree of normalcy, what those moral rapists read at night or what their favourite breakfast cereal is.

maybe when they start pushing their rock up the hill again they think the same thing, what these weird monsters pass their time with.
in hindsight they created all this and we never really asked for any of it. somewhere along the endless timeline some personal or ethical injustice occured sparking the inevitable fire of a deafening primal scream too hard to ignore, even just for a split second... but then again some stories just weren't meant to be told.

the last couple weeks had been a whirlwind. late nights, little sleep, running up bar tabs and occasionally washing it back with a handful of pills when things got too real. you can only chase daybreak so many times in a row before it pushes back. sure things were interesting, but spending huge cash advances in a matter of weeks wasn't a sound idea. an exercise in guarantees, it could and probably will be done, but pointless anyways.

there'd been enough puking in women's bathrooms, percocets and bouncer fights to send most people running for the hills but somehow it was never enough... after all that something was still out of reach, whatever it was, so i did what anyone else would do when faced with nightmarish hallucinations: kept walking. you should have seen there faces though... faces that haunt you, faces that stem from a deep rooted fear in your mind, faces that youve seen a million times before, or maybe a swagger in their step or even the way they speak. people you might pass in the halls and just happen to lock eyes with at the last second, that confused and wondering look, wondering what kind of sick twisted version of reality they are stuck in. things you'd never want to understand, and never will... so these faces got to me as they always do, these maniacs we see when were ready for it, so i decided to spend my time and energy around more civilized people and places until that eternal itch got me again. it would tough without some rest but it wouldn't be the first time. my heart goes out to you insomniacs, you crazy fucks.

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Mafoo

that line really stikes a chord with me. im sure ive said this before, but i really like the feeling tone you create when you write.

moar!

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PLUR
For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return